Five

It Saturday when everything ends.

Adam wakes up in Jensen's arms. His back was pressed to Jensen's chest. Saturdays have always been Adam's favourite day of the week. He gets a little bit of Jensen's attention before he disappears for the rest of the day. Adam has learnt not to ask questions and now that he knows where Jensen is going, he doesn't ask because he doesn't want to hear his husband make excuses or worse, lie to him.

Jensen peppers kisses all over Adam's bare shoulder. His shirt had slipped off one shoulder at one point during the night. He smiles as he looks at Jensen over his shoulder his husband smiles back at him and Adam feels okay. Times like this, everything seemed perfect.

"Morning, beautiful." Jensen whispers, pressing another kiss to Adam's shoulder and one to his hair.

"Morning Jenny."

Jensen lets out a loud groan and playfully pinches Adam's side. "You know I hate that name." he says, falling back against the bed. He lies flat on his back and pulls Adam, who rests his head on his husband's chest, his finger drawing abstract shapes on Jensen's stomach.

"You love it when I call you that." Adam chuckles. Playfully digging his finger into the skin of Jensen stomach. Giggling as Jensen lets out a faux moan of pain.

"I love everything about you." Jensen runs his finger through Adam's hair as he spoke and Adam couldn't help but feel ecstatic. He knows he shouldn't believe everything or anything his husband says but he had made a vow, an oath on the third of September 1999. In sickness and in heart, for rich or for poorer, till death do us part. Jensen might have forgotten about that but Adam hasn't.

"You staying home today? The kids want to spend more time with you, especially Ian. I think he has forgotten your voice even." Adam says and it seemed like that was the wrong to say because Jensen goes still. Knowing a fight was on the horizon, Adam shifts away from Jensen and gets out of bed.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Jensen says, glaring at Adam as he also gets out of bed. Unlike Adam who had on a top and bottom, Jensen just had on a pair of plad paja bottom that hung low on his waist and for a brief moment, Adam wants to pull it down and see his husband's pens because he doesn't even know what it looks like any more, what it feels like anymore. Instead, he just checks the time from the clock on the wall. 7:15am.

"What I mean is. You haven't been home in a while and your kids. The ones I brought into this world. The ones raised for you. Your children, remember them? Well they miss you and want to spend time with you." Adam yells. He tries to make his way to the door but Jensen grabs him by the elbow and pulls him back. He looked angry and had his eyes had this glint in them that the funny part of Adam wishes was guilt.

"I work long hours of the week to pay for the house you live in oh-so-comfortably, to pay for the food you buy with the card I give, to pay for the school fees for all four children and I come home and expect to rest but you keep NAGGING! YOU KEEP COMPLAINING!" Jensen takes a step forward but Adam stands his ground. Jensen's words were a slap to the face.

Adam walks over to his bedside table and grabs his wallet. He pulls out his card and throws it at Jensen. He pulls out the two Atm cards Jensen had given him and slaps it against his chest.

"I have a masters in English language. I gave up my job at Goodwill publishing for you and this is how you repay me! I cook, clean and wash! I take care of OUR kids by MYSELF and this is what you say to me. I have no life outside this home, outside this marriage and this is what you want to say to me this morning!" Adam scream. He walks up close to Jensen. "Well you can kiss my ass goodbye as I walk out the fucking door."

Adam walks as fast as his legs could go out of the room. He finds Jhoni, George and Bella right outside the room. He takes one look at them and guilt settles in. judging by the look on their faces they had heard everything.

"Guys..."

"Can we go to Aunt Sara's?" Jhoni asks, a levelled look on his face that tells Adam not to argue. Adam wants to but he looks at George and Bella, he sees the fear in their eyes and decides. Yes, they need to leave. He wanted them happy for the rest of the day, for the rest of their lives. And he knows they'd be devastated when Jensen leaves by noon. So yes, leaving now would be better.

"Grab a bag and toothbrush. I'll get Ian and meet you downstairs."

Ian was still asleep in his bed when Adam walks in. He packs a small bag for Ian as well as some diapers before picking up his baby. To make matters worse, Jensen hadn't walked out of their room. Adam shakes his head as he carefully walks down the stairs. Ian didn't wake up but he does as Adam straps him into the car seat of the minivan. The drive to Sara's house was silent and Adam spent the entire time pushing back his tears. His children already hear their argument, they don't need to see him cry now. Ian began fussing when they were halfway there and George had to pull off his glasses and make funny faces at his brother until the little boy was laughing. He pulls into Sara's driveway a few minutes later and one by one they get down from the car. It was when he was at her door that Adam realised he hadn't warned his friend he was coming. He rings the bell but doesn't get any reply, so he pulls the key from one of the flower pots and let himself in.

"SARA!" Adam screams, his voice breaking at the end. "SARA!" he screams one more time but doesn't get a reply. Sara lived a stylish three bedroom, four bathroom bungalow. She never really climbing stairs and if she were to have one in her house it'd be an escalator not stairs.

"Wait here a bit. I'll be back." Adam says and proceeds to check the bedroom, making sure to knock before going in but the house was empty. He pulls out his phone and hits the speed-dial for his friend. She picks after two rings.

"My darling gay best friend."

"Sara, I'm in your home. Can we stay here for a day? We'll go back home in the evening." Adam asks her. She must have heard something in his voice because she goes all serious.

"Did something happen? Is it Jensen? Is it serious?" Sara asks. "I can be back in a few hours, I have a meeting with a client who needs my help."

Adam shakes his head absentmindedly until he remembers she could not see him. "It's okay. We are good. We'll talk when you get back."

"Take care of the kids. Take care of yourself too."

"You too, Sara."

He pushes his phone back into his pocket and walks back to the sitting where he found his kids waiting.

"Jhoni, George, can you two go and freshen up while I do the same for Bella and Ian? Afterwards I can check what Sara has and make us breakfast. Is that okay with you?"

"Sure." Jhoni says with a shrug, his face stoic and it scared him how much Jhoni looked like Jensen. "Come on, Potter." He says, pulling George by his hoodie.

Adam chuckles at the nickname, it's what Jhoni uses to show George he cared. Harry Potter was one of Jhoni's favourite character, the other was Pennywise. Adam felt a chill run down his spine as he tries not to think about what Jhoni thinks he has in common with the killer clown.

He lifts Ian from where he was sitting on the chair and grabbed the bags with one hand. Bella holds onto the bag, together they walk to the closest bathroom. Bella had her bath first while Ian played with his toy train that Adam had thankfully packed. He helps her put on a pair of jeans and a white shirt with the words I'm a pretty princess on it.  He blow dries her hair and weaves her hair into her choice hairstyle: a French braid.

"Do you want to wait while I get your brother ready or do you want to wait outside?"

Bella taps her cheek with a finger as she thinks. "Hmmmm...I'll wait outside, papa."

"Alright." Adam smiles at her. "Why don't you go and see if you can put on the television? The remote's on the table."

"Okie, papa." She closes the distance between them and pressed a kiss to his cheek. She blows him a kiss before walking out of the bathroom. He pulls off Ian's pants, all the while calling out each item he pulled out so his son would be familiar with the words.

"Okay, Ian. Let's get you ready for the day. We're going to spend time with your brothers and sister today and it's going to fun." Adam says as he picks Ian and places him in the tub. He kept talking to Ian as he showered for him and continued as he pulls on his clothes and shoes for him.

"Well, aren't you a cutie?" Adam coos as he peppers kisses all over Ian's face laughing as the little boy giggled and grab his face. He holds Ian's hand as they walk to the sitting room. He finds Bella and George sitting and playing a very intense game of rock, paper, scissor, lizard, Spock.

"What about Jhoni?" he asks George as he lets Ian run to the couch. He keeps an eye on Ian as his little boy struggles to climb onto the couch, his little bum sticking out in the air. Adorable.

"He's still in the shower."

Adam looks worriedly in the direction Jhoni had gone to a few minutes ago. He knows he has to talk to his eldest but he doesn't even know how to start explaining it. Should he start with your dad is cheating on me? He found someone better than me? Than us all? Is that what he should tell his sixteen year old who had always looked up to his fathers?

"Can you take care of your little brother while I make breakfast?" Adam asks and his kids nods.

"But poppy, can we watch Gumball? It'll soon come on." Bella pleads, begging her dad with her big green eyes and Adam feels a pang of pain in his heart because they look so much like Jensen's.

"Poppy?" George asks, pulling Adam out of his thoughts before he could go any deeper.

"Sure but watch your brother."

"We promise." Bella and George chorus.

Sara's kitchen was thankfully stocked. He grabbed the pack of bacon and the pack of slice bread resting on the counter top. A few minutes later, he had made toast, bacon and had fried some scrambled eggs. He also made five cups of hot chocolate, making sure to add a pinch of salt in them.

"Kids! Your food is ready!" he yells and soon he hears it, the familiar sound of his kids running. "No running! Are you running with Ian?"

"No!" George screams.

Bella comes into the kitchen first, George coming in a few seconds later before her and Adam's heart calms when he sees George hadn't been running. The kids all take their seat on the small dining table in the kitchen. Jhoni still wasn't out yet and Adam was getting more and more worried by each passing second.

"Is Jhoni st-"

Jhoni walked in just as Adam was about to ask about him. He looked like he had been crying. His eyes were a bit red but his eyes were definitely red rimmed. Adam felt like he had stabbed in the heart. He couldn't hold back and he ends up running to his baby boy, pulling him into a tight hug. He runs his hand through Jhoni's hair and tucks his son's face into his neck as he hugged him as tight as he could.

"I am so sorry, Jhoni. I will try my best to fix this." He promises his boy. He doesn't really know what he's promising but his baby boy, his sixteen year old boy had cried and it was literally killing Adam.

"You didn't do anything." Jhoni says.

Maybe that was the problem. He didn't do anything. He feels little hands wrap around his legs and then on his waist and he looks down to find George, Bella, even Ian hugging him too. This was his family and it'd be complete but someone was missing, someone who Adam had lost. He feels guilty. Because of him, the children had lost their father.

"Okay, okay! Let's eat before everything goes cold." Adam says as he pulled away.

"Did you bring a change of clothes? You're still in your pj." George says as they pull back and make their way to the dining table to take their seat. Adam looks down at himself and blushed all the way to the root of his hair. He had forgotten to pack somethings for himself.

"I saw an ASDA a few blocks away. I can stop by and get you some stuff."

Adam shakes his head. "After you eat. I can wait a little."

"But I c-"

"Nope. I'm not hearing it, I can wait a little." Adam says, his tone telling his eldest that was the end of the discussion. He feeds Ian his feed while the others eat while chattering about the apparently new episode of power rangers they had watched. True to his word, Jhoni had taken a bus to the nearest ASDA to get Adam some things. He comes back a few minutes with a bag containing a pair of sweatpants, a pack of white shirts, another pack of boxers and an extra tooth brush.

Adam is just so grateful to have Jhoni. He takes the bag from his son and gives him a kiss to the cheek. He's going to shower, eat and just spend time with his kids and not think about what could have possibly made Jensen look elsewhere, what could have made Jensen look at someone else.