2: DREAM?

It was the most horrible day in your entire life.

The most unforgettable one…

And the most painful one…

The day you lost him…

You were holding him close into your body feeling his breathing getting ragged while his hold on you was getting tighter.

It hurt you so damn much as if your whole body was being pricked by these needles.

Millions of them.

Striking you all at the same time.

You can almost feel him struggling to keep his breathing even but he couldn’t, his lungs were running out and you couldn’t bare it anymore.

You couldn’t see him like that no more.

So you shut your eyes, inhaling deeply, feeling the heart inside you almost burst out of your chest, feeling the heart inside you scattered into pieces as you murmured to him.

“It’s okay baby, you can let go now if you want to.”

And then just like that you heard a sharp high pitch sound from the heart rate monitor by the bed side table.

“We’re losing him!” You heard the doctor exclaimed.

“No--,” you mumbled to yourself, hot tears voluntarily streamed down your face, “no, no, no.”

You saw his hand fell lifeless on the bed with a thud, his eyes screwed shut, lips parted slightly.

You thought you were ready for this but you weren’t.

The sight of him lifeless on your arms was so painful you felt like dying yourself.

“Baby,” you cupped his face with your warm hands mumbling his name over and over again so he could hear you.

But no response.

You were almost screaming, desperate to wake him up when the doctor and nurses pushed you to the side, Taehyung was fast wrapping you tightly with his tight embrace while the doctors did their best to revive him.

Taehyung turned you around and buried your trembling frame into his chest, “you don’t have to see this Y/N,” he said.

You looked up at him, his eyes were puffy and red, sides of his lids were filled with that salty tears like yours, he was in pain as well, seeing his brother in that bed surrounded by those people on their white gowns.

“Tae I want to be with--,” but you weren’t able to finish your sentence before you collapsed.

“His parents will take care of the funeral,” Taehyung told you.

“Parents? I thought you were both raised in the orphanage?” You asked him.

“Turned out his real family is also here in this hospital and they just accidentally found out about Jungkook being here yesterday.”

“But--.”

“They were looking for him for a very long time Y/N.”

There was a long silence.

Absurd things was happening all at once your brain couldn’t grasp it anymore.

It was too much for you.

---

The ceremony went well, and as promised, Jungkook’s parents did all the work and you and Taehyung were just one of the mere guests on Jungkook’s wake.

It felt weird…Sitting there in the corner with Taehyung.

Looking at those unfamiliar faces took their turns to touch Jungkook’s coffin as if they actually know him.

You scoffed.

You didn’t even waste your energy going near the wooden thing neither did Taehyung. The coffin was close anyway for some reason that his parents didn’t want to disclose.

Hell the whole set up didn’t even look like a funeral at all.

More like a business gathering.

You stared blankly on the white tiled floor for almost felt like infinity.

How come you haven’t cried since you got there?

Not a single tear would drop down from your eyes.

You felt lifeless and numb.

But you could feel your heart breaking inside you still.

You stood up with a light stomp of your foot.

“Y/N,” Taehyung looked up at you with confusion on his eyes.

“Everything is wrong,” you mumbled and exited the chapel and Taehyung followed after you with his wide strides.

“Hey,” he caught your wrist making you turn your gaze back to him.

You didn’t noticed how the tears fell down from your eyes like a stream free falling from a cliff right after you left that place.

Taehyung immediately pulled you into his arms and hugged you tightly allowing you to buried you face on his shirt and crumpled it with your fists.

“It’s wrong,” you sobbed, “I don’t feel it Tae. I don’t feel that he’s dead.”

---

When you opened your eyes, there was a pulsating pain on your temples that you had to press your index fingers on both sides just to lessen the discomfort.

You looked around you and realized that you were actually in the hotel suite already.

You couldn’t remember how you got there.

All you could remember was---.

“JUNGKOOK!” you sat back up from the bed. Your whole body felt like it was struck by lightning.

It can’t be.

And then that electricity inside you died out just as fast as it spread through you.

“Jungkook,” you whispered to yourself, head hanging low looking down on your hands fisting on the comforter wrapped on you.

Soon enough a single drop of tear landed on the back of you palm making it’s way down to the sheets and finally seeping on the cloth as it damp it.

Who are you kidding?

Of course it’s just a dream.

.

.

.

Or is it?