Chapter 9. Run, Baby, Run

~20.07.2013, 2.58 a.m., JEREMY JEFFERSON~

There’s just something I must do. I have to do this. I should not keep him waiting for me. Because I don’t know how long I’ll be living like this. I must set him free. So, I get up from the bed, looking at the dark surroundings of the apartment. I can see Ivan sleeping on the couch from here. It annoys me for a bit. I wonder why. Maybe he’s just born to annoy me. Whatever!

I slowly get out of the bed, creep over to find my sweater and pants and put them on. Now I started to walk really slowly towards the door, managing through the dark surroundings with my limited sight. Have you ever snuck out on someone before? Well, I have. But I always felt safe, like I knew the person was sound asleep and wouldn’t hear me because I was really quiet when it comes to creeping out. But with Ivan, you don’t feel safe. It’s like he can see me through his closed eyes. Isn’t that scary? But yeah… That’s exactly how I feel.

Nonetheless, I’m very much sure that he is asleep since I can hear his heavy breathing on the couch. He doesn’t snore. It’s just that he has that heavy breathing people asleep have so I know that he is asleep. I’ve reached the main door now. Oddly, suddenly, there’s no more of that heavy breathing sound. I turn to look back at Ivan whom I expect to might still be asleep on the couch only to find hard bare muscled body of a man in front of me. I jolted in shock but I did not scream. I was just surprised. I let out a gasp though. How did he get here so fast? When did he wake up? I didn’t even hear him… Okay, now that six-packs is confirmed.

“Fuck, Ivan. You almost scared the shit out of me,” I said.

Ivan crosses his arms as he looks at me suspiciously. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” He asked.

“What? I can’t even go for a walk?” I said. A walk? Really? What a lame excuse. And why the hell am I sweating?

“At 3 a.m. in the morning? Do you think I’m an idiot?” Ivan asked, looking pissed at my stupid excuse. Well, I wouldn’t believe me either.

“I’m just gonna go get something to drink,” I said. Wow! This time I think I’m really convincing.

“You can drink the water from the sink,” Ivan said. What the hell?! What is he now? My dad?! Trying to control my life?

“No. I wanted a can of coffee,” I said, being stern.

He scoffs at me. “I thought you said you don’t eat canned stuff,” he reminded me.

Correct. But… “Well I don’t eat them. But I do drink them, now do I?” I said. Am I not a genius!

He looks pissed. I guess he realized that he had said pretty idiotic stuff himself. “Fuck. Fine. Go wherever you want. Just don’t do anything stupid,” he said with a steady uncaring look on his face. He walks back to the sofa and lies down comfortably on it. Thank God. I better quickly get out of here before he changes his mind and stops me.

I am hesitating actually. I’m going to call him and put an end to everything. I’m also nervous. But I just know that I have to do this. So, I pick up the receiver of the payphone and dial his number. I’m not allowed to use my cell-phone so this is okay, I guess.

I hear the beeping from the other side for a while before a hoarse voice, which obviously sounded as if he had just woken up, picks up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hello, Brandon. Hi,” I greeted.

“Jesus, Jeremy! Where the hell are you?” He asked, knowing immediately it was me.

“I’m in Canada,” I said.

“Seriously?! Damn, I’m so glad you called. How’s it going? The police had told me everything about what happened. I’m not supposed to know where you are though. And they said that you will not contact me at all. Why are you calling? Isn’t it dangerous?” He sounded so worried that it makes me feel really guilty.

But I have to do this. “Look, I know. Sorry. I’m in a hurry and it’s gonna sound a little… ‘rough’…” I said.

“What do you mean?” He asked, sounding confused at my sudden declaration.

“We need to break up, Brandon,” I said. I sound heartless on the outside but I’m seriously breaking apart on the inside.

“What?! Why?!” He asked. I can hear the panic in his voice.

“I don’t know how long I’ll live like this. You should not wait for me.”

“What? Jeremy, why are you even thinking this way? I mean, don’t you love me?”

I sigh, thinking of the possible answer. “I seriously don’t know. I mean, I’m not sure of a lot of things right now,” I said. It’s the truth.

I heard him sigh too. “I don’t know what to say…” He said.

“I’m sorry…” I apologized again. I meant it.

He sighs again. “Look… Just call me again one day when it’s all over and we’ll see how things go from there,” he said. Brandon is always like this. He always thinks positively of things and will not leave things be like that.

“I will,” I promised with a smile formed on my face. I just love that side of him.

“I love you, Jeremy. Whether this works out or not, I just want you to know that,” he said.

I seriously feel like crying right now when I heard him said so but I hold it back in. I must stay strong. For his sake and for my own. “Yeah. Thanks… Bye now,” I said and quickly hang up before he could say anything.

I walk back up to the apartment building and gets on the elevator. Our apartment is on the third floor. When I got out of the elevator and reached the door, I saw that it is ajar and Ivan is already in front of the door, looking really angry.

“The fuck, Jeremy! I saw you at the payphone. Who did you call?” He asked. What? He was spying on me?

“Does it matter?” I asked him uncaringly as I slide inside through the narrow part he left for me to enter from outside of the door. Jesus! What the hell is wrong with him?

“Get your stuffs,” He immediately ordered.

I don’t think I hear things quite right. “What?”

“Get your stuffs! We’re heading out of here,” He ordered again.

Seriously? “What do you mean?” I asked.

“No question. Just do as I say! Hurry!” He rushed me.

Alright, Ivan-whore. Whatever. Well, me and my friends used to call him ‘Ivan-whore’ back at school because Ivan used to sleep around so much. Before that, we called him, ‘Ivanhoe’ but since he was such a douche bag, we changed it to ‘Ivan-whore’ instead. Hahahaha! Old-time memories… I quickly pack up my bags. I got nothing much brought with me anyway. Just things to wear and my toothbrush… God, I wonder why he is in such a hurry anyway.

I saw Ivan is looking out the window anxiously. Then, I saw panic streaks on his face as he said; “Fuck. They’re here.” Who’s here actually? But then I also felt that surge of panic as he urges me out of the apartment. “Go go go go go,” he said as he pushes me. We use the stairs. We move down the stairs really quickly. I feel like fainting… I think I know now why Ivan is mad. The Dead End… They must be here. They must’ve traced my call to Brandon. Fuck. I was such an IDIOT!

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~20.07.2013, 3.25 a.m., IVAN HENDRIK~

I keep on pushing Jeremy is front of me for him to go faster. It is necessary so that I won’t leave him behind. He’ll be much safer if he’s in front of me. We had just reached the car when I heard a voice shouting from the distance. “HEY!” And that’s when I knew I had to move quickly. I push Jeremy inside the car and I got into the driver’s seat.

Several gunshots were fired at the car. “Get down!” I yelled to Jeremy and he quickly hides under the passenger’s seat to my right. I turn on the engine quickly and drive off fast into the dark night.

“Oh my God, they shot at us! They shot at us. Holy shit. Fuck. I’ve never been shot at before. Have you ever been shot before? Okay, stupid question..” I heard Jeremy muttering some shits as he is still hiding under the dashboard. It’s a surprise he even fits under there. Just like the fact that he used to fit in a locker, huh? “Ahh….!” I heard him scream in terror as I swerve the car to the right. And now I saw a car tailing behind us, closing in fast. “Can you drive properly? I’m trying to breathe here!” Jeremy said.

I’m fucking going to ignore him. What matters most right now is to lose the car behind me, not arguing with him. He now started to crawl out from under the dashboard and sits on the passenger’s seat. He quickly buckles up. He is panicking. So, good for him actually… That’s what he gets for being stupid and called someone! As I was about to reach a junction, I quickly swerve to the left and let the car chasing us drive forward. I can see from my rearview mirror that the car is turning back now to tail us again. Well, at least they’re a little behind, right?

“Ahhh! Holy shit! You almost hit that! What are you doing? Are you trying to get me killed?!” I heard Jeremy muttered. Did he mean I almost hit the street sign? Is that what he’s worried about? God damn it!

“Could you just shut up for a moment? Are all gays whiners like you? I’m trying to save your ass here, damn it!” I spat in anger, without thinking that I might have offended him.

Jeremy started to give me a dirty look. He looks real pissed at me. But hell no. I don’t care. “Are all straights jerks like you?” He asked, being cynical. Seriously, I wanted to laugh. Jeremy is sooo good at mixing words together, really. I remain quiet and keep my head focus on the road. “Thank you for not using ‘faggots’ instead,” Jeremy added.

That’s it. “God! I can’t stand you!” I said to him. And that’s when we both felt the impact of our car being hit from behind. “Fuck!” I muttered. I heard Jeremy screaming like a girl beside me. They are now driving to my right side, catching up to our speed. I saw them holding out a gun at us.

“Oh shit. They’re going to shoot at us!” Jeremy screamed. But I only smile as I bump their car quickly, pushing them to the side of the road as we reach a bridge. My plan works! Their car falls off the ridge in their speed. I turn and keep on driving fast on the bridge. I’m afraid if there’ll be more pursuers behind us. We must leave this place quickly. We both saw the car exploded down there in the dark. “Fuck. I think I’m going to throw up,” Jeremy said suddenly.

“Shi.-…no no no no. Don’t you dare, Jeremy,” I warned him. No way. That will be God damn disgusting, right? It’s too late though. Jeremy started to throw up on the carpet of the passenger’s seat. Ewww… “Fuck! Great!” I complained. And now I realized that he is going to faint. “No no no. Jer- Jeremy!” I yelled.

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