Four: Disappointments

Dom’s POV

I watch Shawne walk away with that Angie chick wrapped around her, a considering look on my face. I’m not mad at the interruption, the night is still young and I’m pretty sure Angie isn’t her girlfriend so her presence doesn’t irk me.

She was a prickly one Shawne; hard and thorny on the outside but I knew better than to believe there wasn’t more to her inside. Walls that formidable hid either scars or demons and I wonder if I’ll ever get the chance to see them. After all, as she’d astutely observed, I had my own.

Chelsea and her gang are still hovering expectantly behind me and once Shawne disappears into one of the Club’s private booths, I turn to them and put on my most charming smile. No one ever tells you that the best of actors don’t work in front of a camera. They’re ordinary people who walk around with a mask on their face, one so real no one ever suspects what’s really underneath. They smile and laugh, follow all the right social cues, but behind their eyes is something hidden, a darkness normal people can hardly see let alone recognize. Shawne had eyes like that. So did I. Chelsea’s are bright and dilated with alcohol and a variety of other chemicals. They’re too ruined by drugs to show her insides but I don’t need them. I can tell exactly what’s she’s thinking from her coy smile. She’s one of the first people Chantel introduced me to since I got here and I’d been doing my best to politely ignore her suggestive hints ever since. I faintly wonder where her equally assholish girlfriend was as I laugh at something entirely nonsensical she says and let my eyes rove round the room.

Shawne was still MIA, but I was happy to see that the crowd had increased. I made a mental note to ask Paul, my head bouncer, to stop entry for a while. I expect the early evening crowd would be out in an hour or two and we could free up the space for the late nighters. One of the girl’s made a note about how fit I looked, grabbing my bicep as if to press home her point. All at once, several pairs of hands ran over my arms and back (one even grabbed my ass) with murmurs of appreciation. I tried not to stiffen at the sudden intrusion of personal space and blatant groping, casually taking a large step back. “Ladies.” Despite my discomfort, the smile on my face never wavers “I hate to leave but it’s time for me to check on things downstairs. I’m on the clock you know.”

I ignored the myraid of pouts and bit lips, addressing Chelsea as she’s the head thot here. “In the meantime have a round of drinks. My treat. Okay?” There’s a couple of squeals and Chelsea rolls her eyes before giving me a smile that could only intend to seduce. “How long are you disappearing for this time lover?” I grab her wandering hand in time to stop it from touching my midriff and ran a thumb over her knuckles to soften my abrasiveness. “I’ll find you.” Without another word, I turned and tried not to run for the door.

I could breathe easier when I was outside. Yet another unwanted female attention avoided with minimal blood loss. I was really getting good at this. My ex Kojo would have been proud. Annoyance followed my relief and for what feels like the thousandth time I wonder at how very easily girl’s cross physical boundaries. It’s like they forget consent isn’t just about feminine people. I’d limited this section to women only because I wanted to relax and have a good time yet I still couldn’t get away from random gropes. Maybe it’s because I’m dressed very masculine, so in their fucked up heads I wouldn’t mind being felt up by hot women. The truth is, that little episode back there was just as uncomfortable as it would have been with men. Well, almost. I clap Gary on one meaty shoulder as I flit down the stairs to the main floor. If I thought it was packed upstairs, downstairs was neigh bursting. The loud base reached my ears just before I neared the foot of the stairs. It was darker here than up, a mix of men and women in different shapes, colors and sizes illuminated under flashing strobe lights pumped and grinded to the beat of a Tory Lanez song I didn’t quite recognize. I even spotted a few local B-list celebrities I among the crowd. Cutting through the dance floor to get to the entry doors wasn’t easy at all.

After relaying my instructions, I headed to where Kira, my head bartender and assistant manager was to check that everything was going smoothly. Then I chose a dark corner of the club and decided to watch things for a bit.

Some part of me wants to call Kojo. Tell her I finally did it and hear the pride in her voice wash over me like a warm blanket but I firmly remind myself that I’m done with that. We were bad for each other my ex and I, like moths and flames─ Undoubtedly drawn together but no less likely to kill each other. Even that one phone call could pull me back into a life I was long tired of and I was doing my best to avoid it. It wasn’t really Kojo I missed anyways, although I did still miss her crazy ass even after six months apart. It was the love and security I felt in a relationship, the utter comfort and stability of it all that I wanted. At least that’s what the therapist I’d seen in Chicago had told me. Unfortunately, although there were numerous pickings here, a club wasn’t likely to be the place I find ‘the one’. A certain one upstairs did have my attention however. Unsurprisingly, my mind settles back on the feisty little butch as it has since our very first encounter. Would she be as stubborn as I could already sense? A small smile flitted around my lips; yes. I didn’t for one moment doubt Shawne could be stubborn but that didn’t necessarily mean she was unattainable. Some people just require a bit more patience and determination than others. She seems like someone you have to ease into, very slowly. Of course thinking about easing into her brings all sort of unnecessary horniness and I bit back a sigh. It had been only twenty minutes since I left her and already the urge to go back and exchange some more quips is strong as hell. Where the fuck was Sin when you needed a distraction? I reached for my phone in my pocket to see if she’d texted me yet. She had in fact ten minutes ago that she was here so all I have to do is find her. Remembering Chelsea’s also upstairs made my decision to stay a bit longer here less unappealing.

I catch Sin in the crowd moments later. She’s at the edge of the dance floor, enthusiastically grinding her pelvis into some girl’s ass. I shook my head. From the time stamp on her text it couldn’t have been ten full minutes since she got here and she already had a willing girl. I wasn’t the least bit jealous because I could probably be in the same exact position if I wanted. I just didn’t want, or at least I want something completely different. I made it another fifteen minutes quietly watching her. There was a time I’d desperately had a crush on her and watching her, I can easily remember why. The firm grip she had on her partner’s hips, controlling most of her very erotic movement. The ease and natural way she moved her slender, leather clad body completely in sync with the woman pressing against her. Her dreadlocks, smaller and shorter than my own, were pulled up behind her striking face with only one or two locs falling around her eyes. I couldn’t see the look on the face due to my distance and the lighting but seeing the raw sexual energy that nigga possessed always did a little something to me, even till now.

One of the interesting parts about dating studs is that I never knew exactly how our sexual dynamic was going to play out until we were in bed together. I could generally top most women and they were only too willing to let me, especially the few femmes I did date. Only a handful however had ever managed to firmly bottom me. Kojo had for most of our relationship. As had the very first, much older woman I’d dated in my late teens. Sin could probably go either way in the unlikely event that we had sex. I couldn’t help but wonder how Shawne would be. Most people thought that the bigger person usually topped but you’d be surprised. Anyone who knows about BDSM or sex even knows its not about size. I’m taller and bigger than Kojo and it hadn’t stopped her from tying me up and spanking my ass during some of our sessions.

Sin stops moving and turns the girl around. There’s some back and forth conversation I’m not privy to before Sin crushes their mouths together. I felt the heat I’ve been trying to distract myself from build. The kiss is brief and then Sin is taking her hand, dragging her off the dance floor and towards one of the private booths. I’m half amused and half aroused. I sent her a text to meet me by the bar when she was done and went there to talk to a few of my new customers.

Fifteen minutes later, someone comes up right next to me, settling their forearms on the bar table. I turned my head to meet Sin’s amused eyes.

“You spying on me now?” I snorted. “Hardly spying when you were humping her on a public dance floor. Pretty sure you’re on an undiscovered porn hub account by now.” Sin shrugged and turned to Kira with a wide flirty smile.

“Hi baby girl.” Kira honest to God giggles and even though neither of them have said, I can already tell they’ve slept together. Christ.

By the time we head upstairs, a good hour has past since I left. My eyes immediately scanned the room to see if there was any sign of Shawne. She was by the pool table once more but this time I notice with a slight frown, Angie is wrapped around her arm. Judging from the cat ate the canary smile on her face, they probably used my booth to carnal activities as well. For some reason, I wasn’t as amused as I’d been with Sin and the fact that Shawne didn’t seem averse to her presence anymore made me reconsider my position. She doesn’t notice me right away, her eyes completely absorbed in the dolled up woman standing next to her. Ironically enough, it’s Angie that sees me first and her stance immediately straightens. The look on her face as she rakes over my form isn’t too different from Chelsea’s earlier. I blanch because if I didn’t want Chelsea then I definitely didn’t want the girl Shawne was currently fucking. Angie smiles at me and then turns back to whisper something in Shawne’s ear. Either that or she was nibbling on it.

Sin has already left my side and is once more chatting up a woman. How did she even have the energy to do this? I hoped to God her ‘girls’ don’t start something here. I’d have to talk to her about that later, a conversation I wasn’t eager to have because I didn’t wanna come off judgy.

“So─” I hear and a moment later Chantel’s hand wraps around my waist from behind as she pulls into my side with a glass of wine in the other hand, much like Angie was doing with Shawne. We were both standing directly across from them on the other side of the pool table. “Guess who came to ask me about you just a few minutes ago.”

Chantel smiles at Angie before turning to me, her eyes glinting with amusement. Uh-oh.

“Would it be Shawne’s human coat over there?”

“Mmmm. A lil too early to be jealous baby girl. Don’t you think?” I flushed. “What did she want?”

“Oh just the usual gist everyone’s been asking. Who you are. How I know you. If there’s a Mrs. Dom running around somewhere.” I sighed. “Let me guess, you told her I own the club and I’m single.”

“Uh huh.” Chantel grinned at me before taking a sip of her wine and staring back at the two of them. “So how you plan on getting Shawne to like you after you unwittingly steal her thot-friend?” I grimaced and glared at her but Chantel only laughed. She found my ‘predicament’ with women incredibly amusing. She was right though. I didn’t think Shawne would speak to me again if she even remotely thought Angie and I had something going on. I sighed. “Aww. Don’t worry Dom.I’m sure it won’t be that bad. She might fight you but who knows right?”

“You’re really not helping right now.” I glare at her again and she starts to reply when her eyes shifted just a little and she froze. I watched the emotions on her face morph from amusement to anger and then settle on a disgusted sneer. “Why doesn’t she just fuck her right here in front of everybody?”

I don’t have to look to know who she’s talking about but I look anyway to see Sin and the woman she’s currently with. Chantel drains her glass and storms off muttering curses under her breath. God women were crazy. Angie finally untangles herself from Shawne and they both separate to different corners of the club. I didn’t want to look like a stalker so I gave it a few minutes before all so casually strolling over to Shawne by the mini bar.

“You gon’ buy me another drink nigga?” She inquires once I get next to her and I gave a nonchalant shrug. “Sure.” She perked up and had another glass of Hennessy. I had already drank my one glass of alcohol for the night since I was technically working. “No pina colada this time?” I can hear the sneer in her voice and I give her an amused look cause I can probably bench press this nigga yet she feels like some shit for drinking hard liquor. Women were crazy.

“Nah. I’m working right now. Though I might try the sunshine mojita in a couple of hours. You know having sex in the private booth is against Club policy right?”

I couldn’t resist and the flush that climbs up her cheeks is almost worth it.

“Um…”

“Don’t worry I’m kidding.” I grin at her and she glares but its not as threatening as before. “So I see you kissed and made up with everyone.” Her smirk maddening─ the self satisfied smile of a lioness who got what she wanted and my lower belly knotted. “In a manner of speaking. I see you still not managed to kiss anyone tonight.”

I started to answer when a woman I definitely didn’t know ‘walked past’ us while throwing me a sultry look. “Hi Dom.” I automatically smile in return but I make no move to go after her.” Shawne however watched her reluctant departure with obvious interest then looked at me. “And not from lack of options. Is there a reason you’re curving all these fine ass girls? I mean you are a lesbian right?” Does she just say the first thing that pops in her head with no concern for how it might sound? I liked that. It’s been a while since someone talked to me like they didn’t give a shit what I thought. “Yes. At least the last time I checked.” Shawne shook her head. “So you just gon’ conveniently ignore the first part of the question?”

“What? You want me to tell you what was wrong with that girl?” I gestured in the direction she’d passed and Shawne nodded. I thought for a moment. “Too thirsty.”

“Oh my God. Well is there anyone that meets your standard O great Negro?”

I want to tell her she does but I know its far too soon. The plan was to ease into her and the moment I thought that so help me God my mind automatically went south again. Thankfully, Shawne doesn’t notice.

“Okay. What about that one.” She points to a thick ass girl in a transparent slip a few feet away. “I generally prefer to see the goods after we get to the bedroom. The undressing’s half the fun don’t you think?” My smile is a tad flirty but again she hardly notices. I sigh inwardly. It’s just like with an oblivious straight girl. “Damn you hard to impress. Okay. Lemme see.” She searches the room for another suitable candidate.

“Big booty bitch with the rainbow hair.” I blanch. “That’s way too much Tekashi.”

“Shit nigga. Raven haired chick, three o’clock by the beer fountain.” I follow her gaze to a white girl in a dress and makeup that would be better suited for Halloween and raised a brow. “The gothic clown?” She howled and I had to laugh with her. “Boy you ain’t shit. Okay, okay. What about her friend?” I glance at the gorgeous blonde next to her. She I actually couldn’t fault except for the fact that I have a thing for butch women with a bad attitude? “Too… Alice in wonderland.”

Shawne raises a brow. “What’s wrong with good ol Alice? I’ll have you know she was one of my favorites growing up.”

We kept it up for a bit; she would point out a girl and I’d find a pointless, completely ridiculous reason why I wasn’t interested and Shawne would howl. I really enjoyed hearing her laugh, full and rich and so unlike those tittering giggles Chelsea had.

I was having a really good time. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any more perfect, Shawne eyed another corner. I thought she was going to continue with our game but this time she frowned then rolled her eyes. I turned to find what she was staring at and frowned but not for any reason I could tell. What or who was she glaring at? There was a couple making out on one of the bar stools and a few other women talking around that area. Did she recognize someone she didn’t like?

“Man. I don’t understand that.” Her face is half puzzled and half annoyed. I look from her to the snoggers. “What? Kissing?” Shawne gave me a deadpan stare. “No smart ass. I’m pretty familiar with that part.” There was a hint of that smirk again before she glanced back at them and rolled her eyes again. “Jesus. Might as well just date a man if you’re gonna be that gay.”

My entire brain did a ‘huh’. I stared at the couple for a whole confused minute before it dawned on me what she might be talking about and the little bubble I’d just been floating on burst. Oh please tell me she’s not about to say what I think she is.

“I don’t understand what you talking about.” My tone is a bit colder than it was before but once more, she doesn’t notice. “Those niggas over there. Smacking lips and shit when there’s a variety of smoking hot bitches literally everywhere.”

“Um. You don’t think they qualify as smoking hot bitches?” I try to infuse a little humor in my voice despite my apprehension. She shook her head as if it was some strange concept she couldn’t understand and my stomach sank.

“I mean I guess. But man, that shit’s just wrong.”

My temper flared. “What’s so wrong about it? This is a lesbian party. They’re lesbians who are making out. Why does that bother you so much?” She scoffed. “Look man I don’t give a shit about their business─”

“I dunno. It sounds like you do” “─I just mean… what’s the point of being a lesbian if you gon’ date someone that looks like a man when you look like a man?”

What the─ Of all the stupid shit I’ve heard people say about butch/butch relationships this is the absolute worst. I just stare at her for a moment surprised enough to let it show on my face that I’d expected a different reaction. I’d expected some reservations to her personally dating a stud, even disinterest. This blatant intolerance and ignorance though? I have to say I hadn’t seen it coming which is strange because I usually expect the worst from people.

“What? Why you staring at me like that?”

“Nothing.” I say quietly. “I just don’t like bigots.” Her eyes flash with some more of that fire but I was no longer charmed by them. “What the fuck? Cause I don’t fuck with studs?” She glares at me and then her eyes widen. “Wait. Is that what this is about? Buying me drinks and chatting me up and all that shit?”

“If I remember correctly, you begged me for a freebie the second time.”

I regret the words as soon as they leave my lips and I start to take them back but Shawne doesn’t give me the chance.

“Oh hell nah! Fuck you nigga! Who do fuck you think you are talking to me like that?” The music is loud enough that the entire room doesn’t hear but as small as she is, Shawne has a very commanding presence. She’s one of those people that takes up space wherever she goes and makes you instantly notice her. Her anger at me is blatant, her fists clenched tightly to her sides while she glares up into my face. From her body language and curses you can tell she’s angry and she isn’t afraid to let my much bigger self know it. Despite my own anger, I can feel a tinge of admiration. “Let me make one thing fucking clear. I like girls. Like girly girls. Never, in a million fucking years would I let yo overgrown ass touch me. The fuck?”

She stuffs her hand into her pocket and drew out a couple of bills. “Here. For your fucking drink. You can keep the change and use it to find some other boi to fuck.” With that she tossed the bills at my chest and spun around, storming through the bodies that have somehow surrounded us. If people hadn’t noticed the scene before, they definitely got it now. My cheeks felt hot but not for any good reasons.

Once again, I watch Shawne walk away from me but this time there’s no anticipation behind it. Just a bitter taste in my mouth. I’ve never been rejected this publicly with this much hostility before. Not even in my misguided teens when I ran after all the hot straight girls like everyone else.

“Hey. You okay?” There was no amusement in Chantel’s voice when she came to me this time, just concern. I shifted my mask into place and turned to give her a wane smile.

“Yeah. Just disappointed.”