Chapter 6

Beep... Beep... Beep...

Please shut up. Please leave me alone. All I hear is that stupid beeping noise and all I see is darkness. Lately that's all I see, I feel like I live my life in murky water, but that beeping noise is new and I can't seem to get it to stop.

I was halfway conscious but I didn't feel the need to snap back into reality yet. A few more seconds of peace would be great, I try to roll over but something in my arm stops me. I hadn't noticed it before but it's not like I had opened my eyes to observe my surroundings yet. I try to take the peculiar unfamiliar tube out without opening my eyes and disturbing the calm blackness but I feel a hand push mine away forcing me to open my eyes alarmed.

The beeping noise quickly turns from a slow steady beep to a fast one and I realized it was a heart monitor, not an annoying noise my brain was creating to torture me.

"Relax." My vision focuses as I hear and see the familiar boy that was always there to annoy me— but I couldn't help but smile upon seeing him.

I try to roll onto my stomach again as my back was sore and my butt was numb. but the tube prevented the movement aggravating me. He chuckles as he sees me start to pout, "Leave the IV alone." I was about to pout again but as soon as I registered what he said the beeping sound started to speed up again.

He immediately sits up in the chair that was conveniently placed next to my hospital bed and his faced filled with concern, "What's wrong?"

My eyes went wide in search of something familiar. I saw my clothes in a zip-lock bag and my book-bag on the floor but I did not see any sign of my family.

"Why am I in the hospital?!"

Shit my parents are gonna kill me. Just say goodbye now.

He laughed sitting back in his chair calming down as he realized nothing was wrong with me medically. "Calm down, your blood pressure just got really low. Nurse said you probably just didn't have enough food in your system."

I wasn't sure how he expected me to relax. As soon as I get home I'll need to come right back here because I'll be on the precipice of death, again, once my parents find out I've racked up an unnecessary medical bill.

"Can I ask you something?" I really wasn't in the mood for questions, but I figured it might distract me from the fact that my parents would probably be arriving soon.

"Fine." He seemed hesitant which concerned me, what did he know?

"...Why do you hurt yourself?" I roll my eyes. I would be an idiot to self-harm, adding more scars to my body. "I don't self-harm." He seemed pissed, almost like he was annoyed with me for not answering honestly.

He lifts my arm up, displaying the cuts and I couldn't resist the surprised facial expression that appeared. That was from Cut Arm Thursday, I didn't do it to myself. But my only option was to say I did do it because the alternative was telling him I was abused, and that was much worse. Although if I decided to tell him I did it to myself it would probably lead him to asking again why I would do that in the first place which would bring us full circle, leading to me explaining my depression being linked to the fact that I am neglected at home. So I didn't really have much wiggling room here.

He was sitting there waiting. I thought he would pick up and storm out as soon as he assumed I had lied to him but he really wanted an explanation. I weighed my options and tried to think about what would happen if I told him and all roads led back to him calling the police and having my parents arrested. And while that sounds like a good plan in theory, it is not. Police lead to jail, which leads to us being homeless and practically orphans, I can't rip Kaylee away from her home and school all because I don't want this stupid annoying boy that I had developed some crush on to think I was a maniac.

He starts to tap his foot. He knew I hated that, it makes me panic and I was sure he was doing it on purpose.

"Fine, STOP."

********

Kaylee wakes up around the same time as Jessica in a different room with the same confusion but a different pain.

She couldn't remember what happened and it hurt to even try.

"Oh, hi sleepy head." Kaylee turns spotting a nurse writing something on a clipboard. She looked at the nurse confused.

"uh..m.. Why am I here?" She asks scratching a sore spot on her head.

"How much do you remember?"

She thought about it and realized that there wasn't much she could. The last memory she could conjure was getting home with her sister, bouncing up the stairs, and this is where it gets fuzzy.

"Walking back from school with my sister on... December first— I think." The nurse's eyes go wide. "Honey, that was yesterday do you remember anything from today?" She shakes her head. "No, did something important happen?" The nurse gives her a small reassuring smile so she wouldn't freak out.

"Well, I don't have the full story but apparently your little boyfriend got aggressive while you guys were arguing, he nudged you too hard, you tripped over your sister, fell and hit your head. I suppose you have some damage to your hippocampus if you can't remember anything, but we'll have the doctor come in. Your sister is here, she's passed out as well, not a good day for the De- la Cruz sisters is it?" She smiles.

Kaylee didn't feel the need to correct the nurse and tell her that Jessica's last name is actually Cortez. She was just wondering what the hell her and Anthony were fighting about.

"...I guess I missed a lot," She giggled. "Yes you did. Personally, I don't think you should have a boyfriend. You're so young, don't worry about boys yet." She squeezed her cheek and Kaylee gave a half smile. She didn't have much energy and wasn't really in the mood to deal with so much pep, the nurse was kind of a chatterbox.

"Let me call your parents in and tell them about the memory delay. My name is Elizabeth call me if you need to, I'm a nurse in training."

Once the nurse left the room she tried to recall the last few hours but couldn't.

She moved around trying to get comfortable, waiting for her mommy to come in and tell her everything was going to be alright. As she squirmed in the bed her phone fell in between the railing and nightstand.

She groaned leaning over to reach for it but hit her head against the hard-wood nightstand table forcing her to whip back laying on her pillow in mild pain as she massaged her forehead. It was like flicking on a light switch the way her memories started to slowly seep back into her brain out of the depths of her subconscious. She remembered nearly everything: the abuse, the cuts, the lies, the hatred, the fight, and everything going black.

The nurse was outside warning her parents that she had no recollection of the past couple of hours or even yesterday and she could get that memory back in a few days, weeks, or never but it wasn't a big deal since it was only a small amount of time. Her parents had never been happier.

Kaylee knew this was her opportunity to set everything back into place. She would be safe, she could help Jessica, they wouldn't have to worry about a new baby, and life could be a bit easier.

********

I take in a deep breath then finally look Jayden in the eyes. He was pissed and impatient. He wanted answers but the questions he was asking had answers he really didn't want to hear.

"Do you or do you not hurt yourself?"

His calmness annoyed me and so did his presumptuousness, he had no right to ask me that. Granted, I did give him permission to ask me a question but he should have read the room once I answered and shut up. "I do not self-harm, I already told you this." I growl.

He couldn't hide or conceal his own anger and concern.

Why did he care so much? All he had to do was leave it alone. Leave me alone. Nothing good has ever come from popping the bubbles of ignorance people live in.

He started to yell and it didn't scare me, only bothered me. "Then what are these?!" And he lifted my arm and leg to show all my scars and bruises that I usually covered up with jeans and sweaters.

I push him away and yank my limbs back shocked that he felt comfortable enough to keep touching me and asking questions when I really didn't know him that well. "Why do you even care? It doesn't matter!"

I could tell he was frustrated and feeling resentful.

What was I supposed to do? Just tell him? It's not something to be taken lightly and that's what he doesn't understand.

He was pacing back and forth and every time he was about to say something, he stopped himself and kept pacing.

I was sitting in the bed uncomfortably with my arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

What do I do in a situation like this? Scratch my head?

After a while he was finally calm enough form a sentence and his first words were through gritted teeth, "It does matter to me because— and it may come as a shock— but somebody actually cares about you."

I wasn't sure what he meant by that. He obviously couldn't have known that no one at home cared for me so how did his thoughtless words hold so much meaning?

"I care about you and I don't want anything to happen to you. And I want to know who is doing this. Now is it you or somebody else?" I look down as his volume rises. "Stop yelling at me." I was flustered and bothered. He cared about me? What did he stand to gain from that? People don't just care about other people like that. Do they?

"What is wrong with you Cortez?"

"I can't tell you!" I couldn't tell him no matter how bad I wanted to. If he wasn't lying, is he was being serious, and he actually cared about me I was sure it would disintegrate as soon as he found out I was an abused and unloved freak. People may care for other people just like that, but people don't care about my people just like that.

"Fine. I'll leave then." I wasn't sure why that hurt me so much. I should be glad. My parents would be here soon and if they saw him that would only lead to more trouble. I should want him to leave, but how could I want the only person who seems to give a shit about what happens to me besides my sister just walk out the door? If he walked out, that would be the end. No more cocky jokes, no more playful arguments, no more silly questions, no more funny flirting. He was gone, my only friend since I was seven would disappear.

A small tear escaped and I wiped my face roughly as I reprimanded my body for allowing it to happen. "Fine." I respond trying to sound unbothered. Taking in deep breathes I wipe my eyes and roll to lay down facing away from him.

There were a few moments of silence where I waited to hear the sound of the door closing so I could let out a few more self-pity tears in private but the sound never came.

I hear a chair pulling out instead. I look at the vase on my nightstand giving off a reflection and watch as he sat down with a palm to his face frustrated.

He said he was leaving and yet he was still here, leaving my underdeveloped social human understandings distraught.

I didn't turn back around. I didn't want to look him directly in the face. I was hurting him in some way and that fact was hurting me. He should leave and never look back; I shouldn't have let myself get so attached. But he's here, and I'm attached. So what do you do once you're stuck?

*******

Kaylee hears her name being coed softly by her father, she turns to see both her parents entering quietly as to not disturb her. Kaylee immediately wanted to send them both glares before she remembered her plan and changed her expression into a convincing smile.

She knew she should be at least a bit grateful that she lived her whole life being untouched by either of them but she couldn't help feeling only hate because she knew that Jessica lived her life the exact opposite way. She didn't want them locked up because she knew what would follow but she honestly didn't know how much longer she could stand living with them, knowing who they really are.

Jessica has only a few years but Kaylee had more, and they would probably expect her to stay longer because she's their "baby" so who knows how long she would have to keep this act up.

As Kaylee looked at them, she couldn't help but see Jessica and feel horrible because she knew that Jessica wouldn't ever have the same escape opportunity that Kaylee was just given. She had too many scars and memories to simply forget. All she could really do at this point for Jessica, besides going to the police, was sneak her food and tend to her wounds at night which felt sad and disturbing.

She looks at both of her parents with an unfaltering fake smile before speaking in a hoarse voice, "Hi mommy, daddy." It was hard not to notice both of their faces lifting in relief.

Kaila smiles sweetly at the favored daughter before turning to her husband in a whisper, "I really wasn't ready for another baby," receiving a nod in agreement and, "I didn't want to lose this baby," in response.

Kaylee knew she had just saved Jessica and herself from a different kind of torture, the torture of having to watch some pure adorable kid being raised by monsters and not being able to do anything about it.

She yawns trying to make an excuse to turn over and hate herself in silence for what she just did. If she would have told them the truth, told them that she remembered and that she hated them maybe she could have shared the torture with Jessica and she wouldn't have it as bad. It was selfish of her to take this opportunity, but it was also selfless of her because she saved the unborn child from the same fate.

"I'm tired, can I go to sleep?" They both nod with their sickly sweet smiles and she returns her fake one rolling over to act as though she had fallen asleep all the while listening to them plot and plan.

**********

It was really quiet. I didn't even know if Jayden was still here. I turn and see he was still next to me and he still had his head in his hands covering most of his face.

I wouldn't have noticed he was crying if I hadn't been staring at him for the last few minutes and saw that his body was moving up and down in a slow bouncing movement.

I couldn't understand why he was crying. It was my pain not his. There was no need for him to waste his tears. I tap him and his moving ceased completely. I couldn't even confidently say he was breathing. He looked dead and he wouldn't look up at me.

What was he doing? What was he thinking? Did I do something to him?

I finally gain the courage to speak, "um.. are you crying for me..?" All I hear is a weird unfamiliar almost sinister laugh. A laugh that gave me a look into what the answer was, "No one would cry for you. You're worthless."

I was stunned, I would have been alright with assuming that was his answer but actually hearing the words leave his mouth was heartbreaking. I was frozen not knowing what to do or say. He finally looked up and I see it's not Jayden but Anthony and a scream in shock and fear rang loudly from my throat.

I tried to get up but couldn't, and as my eyes scanned the bright room I saw Jayden tied up in the corner struggling to get free.

I break the chains that are trapping me and I try to run out but he catches me and throws me to the floor and as I prepare myself for the painful impact, I realize that I'm not in the hospital anymore— I'm in a room I have never been in before.

It was a dark and bone chilling kind of atmosphere. I spot a buffet of food, food that I didn't trust, and as I take a step back deciding I needed to get away I started plummeting into the ground...

I wake up suddenly, terrified and gasping for air. It had been a horrible confusing nightmare and I didn't even remember falling asleep in the first place.

I turn and see Jayden looking at me startled with humor tainted on his lips and I couldn't help but feel an insane sense of relief upon seeing him. Unexpectedly I hug him needing his reassurance for some odd reason, "It was just a dream right?" And he looks at me with a small smirk and a laugh hidden in his eyes.

"Which part? The one where you haven't told me why you have scars or the part where I got tied to the floor by some kid?" I gasp releasing him confused.

Is he serious? Was it not just a dream? — And is he really still hung up on me not telling him the biggest secret of my life?

"So all that really happened..?" He chuckled sitting back down.

"The first part is real, the kidnappings fake you just talk a lot in your sleep."

I didn't have time to feel relief because he began with his chatterbox ways that I've weirdly grown accustomed to.

"You know at first I thought you were talking to me. Then you started yelling and I was like "What the hell is she yelling at me for? I really haven't done anything yet." But then you—"

Yet?

"—started saying a lot of weird things and I was honestly about to call the nurse or a psych ward cause I thought you were mental—"

"Okay, I get it." I interrupt him trying not to laugh as I roll my eyes.

"Wait, you haven't heard the best part. So instead of getting you committed I stayed and listened. I walked over to the other side of the room and I saw you were actually sleeping and it was a whole "Thank god. I don't really want to end up dating a psycho," moment. So—"

What?

His voice faded in my head as my eyes went wide. I could not tell the difference between joking flirting and actual flirting as he wasn't helping. I couldn't tell if he actually liked me or if he was just being playful— and I really wished he would stop throwing me in for a loop.

"—I started whispering different foods in your ear and I saw you relax. The switch up was honestly hilarious but I sat back down and decided to have some mercy. Then you woke up screaming and scared the shit out of me and now you're all caught up."

I scoff and laid back down secretly relieved that it was all just a dream and he was here to watch over me the whole time. "So are you going to tell me why you have those scars? Or..." And there it is.

I cover my face dramatically letting out a loud groan, "Jesus— fuck, you're persistent." He couldn't help but lean back in his chair amused, "No I'm not going to tell you asshole because you really don't want to know." His amusement quickly disappeared and he scoffed standing up.

"You're really not going to tell me?" I didn't answer I just simply looked at him with a blank expression. He turns theatrically to leave.

"What?! Where are you going?" I almost wanted to laugh at the fact that he was so butthurt but I knew it wasn't going to be funny when he started refusing to talk to me or see me. He had to understand that this wasn't some elementary school secret. I didn't steal a pencil from the girl who sat in the desk next to me. My parents are monsters and if he keeps digging his life could be in actual danger.

He turns around with his arms crossed over his chest like a five-year-old.

"If you don't want to tell me then that means you don't trust me, and without trust there's no friendship, no relationship. So I guess... I just have to forget you." I gave him an are you serious look and he huffed then slammed the door.

I slam my head back into the pillow with a groan, now I'm alone and bored and who knows if he'll ever speak to me again. This day just got really shitty and it's only going to get worse once my parents got here. I just lost a friend, and I'm probably going to lose my life pretty soon.

I knew it was selfish to want him to be my friend. But aren't I be allowed to be selfish sometimes?