Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Colton’s pov

I was angry at myself. I acted like a complete dick at the club. I have been so angry over Colby’s death, but I took it out on the wrong person. Joslyn did nothing wrong. I needed to apologize, but somehow, I didn’t think that was going to be enough. I really screwed up.

I know she would never cheat on me. She wasn’t like that. Now I probably ruined what we did have. I wondered if I called her would she even talk to me. I was scared of what she would say. Then again not calling could make things a lot worse. I decided to just pick up the phone and call her. Maybe she would just let it go to voicemail, and I could leave an apology there. No such luck on the second ring she answered.

“Hello.”

“Hey, Joslyn, I am so sorry for how I acted tonight at the club.”

“Colton what was with you?”

“Honestly I don’t know. I have been so angry over the fire, but I took it out on the wrong person.”

“You told me we couldn’t let anyone at the firehouse know we are together, so I danced with my best friend Damian. And by the way he is like my brother, and very gay.”

I smiled a little when she said that. I was happy knowing someone wasn’t trying to snag my girl. It also made me feel even more like a complete fool.

“I am sorry baby girl. I talked to my captain, and we don’t have to hide our relationship. That is if you’ll still be my girl.”

“I thought you said he didn’t want people that worked together dating?”

“Normally he doesn’t. I told him if he had a problem with it he could move me to a different firehouse, but he said since you’re a paramedic and not a firefighter it shouldn’t be a problem.”

“Wait you were going to risk your job for me?”

“Of course.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re worth it.”

The phone went silent, and I wondered if she had hung up. Did I make another mistake? Was she mad I went to my Captain about us? I didn’t want to make her angry.

“Colton would you like to come over, and talk in person?”

“I’d love to baby I’ll be right over.”

I hung up and grabbed my keys.

I couldn’t wait to see her, so I could make things better. If she gave me another chance I would never screw up again. I loved Joslyn very much, and I never wanted to do anything to disappoint her. I could tell she was hurt when I walked away from her. I had a lot of making up to do. I needed to win back my girl.

Joslynn’s pov

I couldn’t believe Colton was willing to give up his job for me. That meant a lot to me. No, I wasn’t just going to forgive him for the way he acted. We had a lot to talk about, but he did deserve another chance. I loved him, and I wasn’t willing to give up on us just yet.

We just needed to talk and move past this. Maybe this will make us stronger. I heard a knock on the door, so I hurried to go answer it.

“Hey beautiful.”

“Hey come on in.”

He came in and tried to kiss me, but I moved away. He wasn’t just going to be forgiven like that. He was going to have to work for these kisses.

“You don’t want to kiss me?”

“We need to talk first Colton. The way you treated me was wrong. I did nothing wrong and did not deserve that.”

“I know Joslyn, and I’m sorry.”

“Saying sorry doesn’t always fix everything. It’s as if you don’t trust me.”

“I do trust you. I just have a lot going on.”

“I know you do. Maybe we should take a little break.”

“Are you saying you don’t want to be with me?”

“I do want to be with you. It’s just you have so much going on. I think maybe you need time to deal with all of it before you’re in a relationship.”

“Please don’t say that. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“I love you Colton I really do, but you hurt me by the way you acted.”

“I’m sorry I never wanted to ever hurt you. I love you Joslyn. Please give me another chance.”

I didn’t know what to do. Part of me knew he needed time, but the other part of me didn’t want to let him go. The thought of being without him just hurt too badly. I just don’t want to get hurt.

He has so much anger inside of him. He isn’t dealing with his grief, and that scares me. I want to be with him. I just don’t know if I can right now. I can’t think of me right now. I have to do what’s best for him. If our love is strong it will make it through this. I just need him to see where I am coming from, and I don’t think he is.