Fake It Till You Make It

After laying tied down to a crib for another few hours I fall asleep, still feeling the buzz from last nights party. I look over at the alarm clock across the room.

"It's six in the morning?!"

The party was at nine. I drank for a good few hours so I must've passed out around twelve maybe twelve thirty. I'm exhausted. I look around the room, now that my eyes are back to normal. Blue walls, blue carpet, tons of toys. I look at the changing table and the end of the crib.

Huh?

It looks like someone gave a baby boys nursery some growth hormones. Everything looks bigger than a usual babys room. I'm a small guy, 5'3, I probably could've fit in a real nursery to be honest. I continue looking around, watching the sun peak through the baby blue curtains.

"I really have to pee." I try to move my arms but no use. I kick my legs. Nothing. I'm stuck. Really stuck. This is just like those stories I've read. Kidnapped and forced to be someone's baby. This can't really be happening though. Those are just stories right?

I close my eyes and after a while of holding my bladder I start getting sharp pains. I shut my eyes tight and just let it all flow out. This is so gross.

"Let me out!" I yell

"Kaylee I swear to god!"

I can't lay here in a wet diaper.

Please let this be a joke. A sick joke that will end as soon as she wakes up, I yell a few more times before I hear footsteps and the door swing open.

"Good morning sleepy head!" She leans down and presses her hand on my diaper. "Aw who's mommy's wet little boy huh?"

"Kaylee I'm so sorry for everything please let me go!" I plead with her.

"I know little Landon you need a diaper change, who has a wet diaper huh?" She smiles and unties my hands lifiting me up.

"Kaylee put me down!"

I know I'm short but come on. Can she really lift me? I try to fight back with everything in me but I feel so sick and weak. What did she do to me?

"Here we go little man, shh I know you're all wet and hungry mommy will get you all cleaned up and fed."

What the hell? Is she's pretending she can't hear me? Just pretending I'm some cranky morning baby?

Kaylee lays me down on the changing table and starts undoing the diaper. I let her do what she wants because honestly I just want this thing off of me, She tapes a new diaper on me and continues to baby talk me.

I just have to relax. Just figure out a way to escape.

"Come on my hungry man let's get some food in your tum tum!"

I'm already sick of the baby talk, but I am starving. I smell pancakes. At least I'll be able to eat.

Kaylee sits me down in some big chair and wraps a bib around my neck. I can see a big stack of pancakes on the counter. Mmm. She walks to the fridge, grabs a baby food jar and brings it over to me with a tiny plastic spoon.

No no no! Where are my pancakes?! I refuse to eat this crap.

"Open up for mommy baby!" She smiles making airplane noises and hitting my closed lips.

"I want those pancakes, what the is this shit?" I push the spoon away.

"I know my boy is hungry, come on eat for mommy, then you can sit in the living room and play!"

Sit in the living room and play huh? Perfect. I'll run as soon as she puts me down.

Until then I'll have to fake it till I make it.

I open up my mouth and try to swallow the food. It tastes like apples and strawberries, so it wasn't too bad.

"What a messy boy I have!" Kaylee smiles and wipes my face with my bib. She hands me a sippy cup filled with what tastes like apple juice and sits down across from me.

"After mommy eats you can play while she cleans up around the house!"

She starts eating her pancakes. Or should I say MY pancakes. They look so good. This girl is twisted, making me watch her eat delicious pancakes, while I just guzzled down some mashed up fruit.

"Play!" I yell and push the sippy cup off the tray. Fake it till I make it, is all I keep saying to myself.

"Okay baby okay!" She picks me up and starts to carry me to the living room.

Finally. Freedom.

She sets me down in the middle of the floor, and just when I'm about to run she handcuffs my hand to the coffee table.

"Can't have my new little boy try anything stupid now can I?" She laughs and walks away, leaving me with some blocks and Spongebob on tv.

Fake it till you make it huh Landon? You idiot. I lay back and continue to belittle myself as I feel my crotch get warm. Oh no! my body can't be getting used to this already! Maybe she put something in my drink! I have to get out of here!

I pull on my hand cuff and the coffee table follows. How am I going to run with a table stuck to me? I look around for something to cut them off with.

"Ah ha, screwdriver." I try to reach for it but can't make it very far. I start scooting the table over with me.

*screech*

No no shut up! I move slower but

*screech*

Just a few more steps and-

"Landon are you serious?"

I look at the table in betrayal.

Stupid table.

I'm uncuffed and quickly picked up.

"Why can't you take your punishment like a man huh?" She smacks my butt hard.

"Ow! Let me go you psycho bitch!"

She lays down another smack.

"You're not going anywhere Landon, got it? I'm always one step ahead." She laughs and drags me by my arms down the hall.

"Now since baby's been a naughty boy you can stay in your room."

"No let me go!"

She slams the door and I hear it lock from the outside. I just want to go home. I walk over to the window and try to push it up, but to no surpise she's put outside locks on that too.

"Kaylee please!" I scream through the door.

This is it.

Who knows how long she's going to keep this up. My life is ruined.

I lean against the door and begin to cry.

"Baby mommy's so sorry she had to punish you." Kaylee says through the door. She opens it up and hugs me tight.

"Mommy doesn't want you crying, she loves you."

I push her off me.

"Love me? You love me?! Let me go then!"

The girl that had just been spanking me kisses me hard and pulls away with a smile.

"You're staying here with me Landon, not only for revenge but I've always wanted a baby and well.. I can't have one."

"Find someone else then! I want to live my life. My ADULT life.

She laughs and shakes her head. "You'll get used to it baby boy, now play in here for a bit, mommy loves you."

She closes and re locks the door.

Is she kidding me?! What is her problem. Is she insane?!

Well she has got to be insane right?! She really wants a man to be her baby?

I lay on the soft blue carpet and look up at the ceiling, replaying my last 24 hours over and over again. This is all I've ever wanted.

Attention from Kaylee, not like this though. Anything but this. The door bell rings and snaps me back into reality.

"Baby we have company!"

Company? Company?! No no!

No one can see me like this. I start pacing around the room. My breath hitches and I feel a panic attack setting in.

Think Landon! I pace faster hitting my head like an old juke box hoping an idea will pop out like an old 50's song.

I'll just um

I'll go to hide in the closet when I see the door knob turn!