14. Possessive jerks, mouthwashes and teases

I have never dreamed of love the way it is right now. This love, it is full of chaos and kindness. Of heart and head. This love that is you. - Alexandra

~~~

(Alexandra)

What the hell was he doing? Did he forget everything he had just said to her?

The nerve of this man. And as if it wasn't enough, he was kissing her on her mouth. As if-as if they were a real couple or something.

She didn't know why she had to go and fall for this annoying man.

He leaned close to her and whispered, "close your mouth, darling or are you asking for another kiss?"

He was laughing at her. Wasn't he?

He is just so-

She stomped his feet surreptitiously and he yelped and jumped back, muttering curses under his breath.

She ignored him and turned to Johan. "Is your grandma gone?"

He laughed. "Don't worry, I was just coming from the restroom. She is still inside."

"That's a relief." She sighed. She was happy she got to talk with Johan, but no, she would never want to talk with Aunt Beatrice. No way.

"I didn't catch you when we came. Wait, oh, come on... Alex, were you hiding from her? You- unbelievable."

"Can you blame me? And I was under the table." She said with a smile, as he pushed his glasses up. He was cute in them, he had always been cute. And he had been her friend, boyfriend for a month and he had only ever been cute to her.

Not handsome. Not sexy. Nothing.

"Hey, how is Stella?" He asked, pulling her out of her thoughts.

"Ah. Stella." Her voice was wistful. "She must be fine. Haven't talked to her in a while. I lost my phone and lost all my contacts and she is in the honeymoon phase. So she is not replying to my mails. God, I just miss her." Alex said and she suddenly missed Stella, so damn much.

Alex had never had a secret from Stella and now she was somewhere where Alex couldn't reach. God. What she would give to have Stella by her side right now. Stella would flip out if she learnt what was happening in Alex' life. She'd maybe go as far as to cut Logan's head off. Okay, that was an exaggeration, but you never knew with Stella.

But Stella was with her husband, new husband and unlike Alex's forthcoming marriage, Stella's was real. And Adam Haines wanted to tour with her for half a year. She would be in Canada this month, if they were right on schedule.

"Yeah? I have never seen you without her. Except when we went on dates." His eyes glinted as he looked at her. Very cute eyes, too. But she had never dreamed of those eyes. "Hey remember the time we went to Spider Man... "

"Oh God, how can I forget?" She laughed. Logan cleared his throat and looked at his watch. If she could just kick him in the gut...

"Alex, honey, we really need to go. We need to buy your dress for the gala." He said, smiling at her that 100 Watts fake smile, before smiling like a wolf at Johan. God. That wasn't a smile. Not at all. "You remember?" He shook his head at her.

"What gala?" She gritted out. Was this all a game to him? With the blink of an eye, he turned from hot to cold and back to hot and she was confused of this. Confused of him, everything.

Her heart was already in a very sticky situation because of him and she just couldn't... She bared her teeth right back at him in a vicious smile and he looked scared for a moment.

"The charity gala we have to go tomorrow? Oh, God, your little head..." He pinched her cheeks like she was a kid or something. Jerk. "Cute."

"I don't remember any gala. You didn't tell me. And don't patronize me, you pompous fool."

"She is so fiesty. That is what I love the most about her." He said to Johan and then turned back to her. "Honey, I wrote you a note."

"What happened to your mouth? You couldn't have said it to me directly? You say everything you don't need to say."

"Ok, I am sorry. I will just go and pick it up for you if you rather sit with him and talk." He growled. Yes. It really sounded like a growl.

"Hey Alex, umm, I should go." Johan looked nervously from her to Logan.

"Yeah, you should."

"Wait, Johan, please stop. Just give me your number. I will call you later when there are no morons around." She said and he scribbled his number in his card and handed it to her. "This is my personal line. That is my business one."

"Hey, so are you working for the same company, the one that makes animations?"

Logan was tapping his shoes. Tap. Tap. Tap. It was a very annoying sound.

Alex glared at him and he stopped to give her an innocent smile, before he resumed. Tap. Tap. Tap.

She looked back at Johan who was twitching. He looked so uncomfortable, poor guy. "So?" She asked him with a comforting smile. He instantly smiled back.

Johan had been her senior for a year and he got selected for the job with some big guns in Viscom field.

"Yeah. I am managing my own team now. It is kind of fun."

"Good for you." She said.

"Are you coming yet? Or do you need another 24 hours?"

"What the hell is your problem? Did you forget to take your hypertension tablet when you woke up this morning?"

"Oh, uh, okay, bye Alex. Grandma will be waiting. Call me." Johan looked nervously at them before he backed away and almost ran back to where his grandmother was.

"What is your problem? Huh? Why are you being so rude to everyone?" She glared at him. He looked at her with those cool eyes and she really wasn't a violent girl, she didn't condone to violence. But right this moment, she wanted to gouge his eyes out. "Are you just this unpleasant always or is this something personal to you? You should really do something about that. It is not attractive. It is very unpleasant for everyone."

"As I said, we really have to go pick out your outfit. So are you coming or are you going to act out your inner Dr. Phil fantasies with me?" He said in a bland tone before walking back to the table.

"What now?"

"I haven't paid yet."

"So why were you wasting our time back there, when you could have finished everything and came back? I could have talked peacefully with Johan."

"Could have, but what can I say? I just wanted to annoy you."

"Your brain is not working right."

"Oh-"

"Just shut up and don't talk to me. Let us make a pact to never talk with each other. I feel like I am going to pop all my veins and arteries when I am talking with you. You are not good for me." She whisper yelled at him and he shook his head with a smile.

He was still smiling?

"So-"

"Don't talk." She said and walked away.

~~~

(Logan)

Ok, I think I have gone a little overboard.

Try 'a lot?'

But why is she kissing him?

He hated seeing that. He hated seeing her with Johan. He hated that Johan had known a part of her life he could never get to know, but that was totally stupid when he thought about it now.

He tipped generously--the man had been waiting for ten minutes-- and muttered a sorry before he walked away to his car.

There leaning against his car was Alex, hands crossed across her chest, in her neatly tailored suit and she looked ready to be in one of those chic business magazines. She looked like power.

The anger in her eyes, the flushed cheeks, the locks of hair that was now out of her severe braid, the way she was biting her lips-- God, sometimes she just made him feel irrational, illogical things. Things he had never felt or had time to feel.

He didn't know what to do about all these confusion. She was like a puzzle, and he couldn't solve her or his feelings, no matter how hard he tried.

He had always had a clear path, a clearer mind. No one had shaken him up, not anyone outside his family. And his best friend.

He had never felt a lot of feelings for women. Yes. He liked their company. He likes talking with some and kissing some, but it was all done with amicably, and without any real involvement.

Cold.

Some might even call him cold.

But from the moment he saw her arguing with the waitress in that eatery, he had been anywhere near cold. She made him feel warn, fuzzy feelings.

It was strange, these feeling tumbling inside him and filling him up and overflowing. As he had said a thousand time to his stupid heart, he couldn't afford to lose sight of what he wanted.

He wanted more success. He wanted a family. A marriage. With someone who would fit in his life and his brain, seamlessly. Without causing any disruption or distraction.

And that was why she wouldn't do.

She is chaos. She is wild and uncontrollable and he didn't even want to control her. He wanted to go along with her, wherever she would take him and that was the problem.

He wasn't made for chaos. He wasn't made for entropy.

"Are you going to stand there and stare or get in and drive to wherever the heck you wanted to go when I was talking with Johan?"

He was startled by the sound of her voice and realized he had been just standing there and staring.

"Yes, yes."

"Thank God." She muttered before she slammed his door shut. He winced, and refused to go back and check the door. It would be fine. Alright.

One of his friends owned a cute boutique and that was where he was going to take her.

He stopped in front of Glam Girls, Pam's cozy boutique and stepped out.

"Uh-oh." He heard her saying.

"What?"

"Pam and I--"

"You know Pam?"

"Uhm. Yes." She nodded before looking away.

"What did you do to her?"

"Why do you simply assume that it is my fault?"

"Because I know Pam and she isn't the one who starts trouble."

"Yeah, right!" She scoffed before she looked at him. "I have many dresses. I can wear one of them. Or we can go somewhere else."

"I already called her to say we were coming. I can't just back out."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because she is my friend."

"Yeah, friend! Alright. That is what we are calling every woman you have ever dated?"

"We dated, yes, but we parted and stayed friends."

"Oh and here I thought amicable breakups are a myth." She had this totally infuriating smile on her lips that he wanted to kiss away. Her lips were always distracting him.

The lilt in her voice, the cool and calm way she looked like she knew she owned this conversation and him... God, it was just so annoying. And he liked it, like the way she carried herself.

"Don't be a child and come in." He said.

"What if I don't want to?" She throw her head back and looked at him with those challenging eyes. The green eyes. With a hint of magical gold in them-- he had never seen such beautiful eyes or maybe he had seen it, but they didn't look as beautiful as her eyes were.

"I can easily carry you. Okay, maybe not as easily I could have other women, but still, I can."

"Take that back." Now she wasn't as calm or cool.

"What?"

"You just-you called me fat."

"Did I?"

"You know you did. You are-" And then she stopped and looked away.

There was something in her eyes that made him feel like he was taking bottles of acid.

Shit.

"Alex, I am just kidding." He muttered.

"It is alright. I know I am not exactly thin. But..."

"God. Shit. I didn't mean it."

"No. It is okay. I had been called ugly, fat and --" Her lips trembled. "You- when you said that, it just dredged up past memories. Dreadful ones."

"Oh my God. You are perfect the way you are. Beautiful. I am sorry. Come on."

And then she was clutching her stomach and laughing. And laughing until she was crying. "Gotcha! God, the look on your face! God, I wish I had taken a photo."

His lips twitched as he shook his head. "Haha. Very amusing. You are such a kid."

She stuck her tongue out.

He walked inside the corridor and pushed the door open. It trilled some piano note and said welcome.

"Hey, Logan." Pam, looking taller than she had ever looked, grabbed him by his lapels and kissed him.

~~~

(Alexandra)

Pam is kissing him. And he is not doing anything to stop it.

Alex's stomach twisted and she felt her heart gave a very unpleasant tug. It was like a vile medicine at the tip of her tongue.

But she wasn't going to back off and be sophisticated and what not. She wasn't sophisticated as she had said to him the first time.

If she couldn't talk to a man and be friendly because of the contract, he couldn't kiss anyone, as well.

Except, may be you? That annoying voice should be eradicated.

That goes without saying, you little pipsqueak. Shut up. I am not talking to you.

But I am you.

Whatever.

"Get you hands off my man, Pam or I will cut it for you if it's too hard to keep them off him." Okay, that wasn't exactly the words she had wanted to say, but they were the ones that came out. Whatever.

He jerked away from Pam and Pam stumbled back and her back hit the carpeted floor with a thud.

"Ooof." Pam said and cursed.

"Oops." Alex twitched her lips as she looked down at the woman sprawled on the floor with a smile. She couldn't help it. She wasn't really this kind of girl, but Pam, she couldn't just stand her.

Their feud was never anything personal. It wasn't like Pam had done anything to her. They were never close enough to betray each other. It was just the clash of personalities. Just looking at Pam offend her sensibilities.

And Logan, he looked pale. Yeah. Like really pale. Like he had just seen a ghost pale. He should be.

"Go wash your mouth." She said and he looked at her like she was mad. Oh, hell yes, she was. So mad.

"W-what?"

"Am I unclear? Did I stutter like you just did? Maybe use some listerine. Um, wait, there is no maybe about it. If you ever want to kiss this..." She pointed to her lips and his eyes were wide as he took in her face.

"What the hell Logan..." They both ignored the woman in the floor. "Help me up. This little--" Blah. Blah. Blah.

"If you ever want to lay those lips," she poked his lips and his eyes looked like they would roll out of their sockets and hit the floor where Pam was currently sitting. "On mine, use a bottle of listerine to clean it or you are never kissing me. Never again." Haha!

Logan's mouth hung open. He looked at her like he had never seen her before, like she was an alien or something.

She wanted to add an evil laugh at the end, to punctuate her words, she really wanted to, but she couldn't just spoil the fun.

"Are you going to help me up?" The squeaky voice asked. Ugh. The voice.

"Sor-sorry, Pam." He said as he pulled her to her feet.

"Alexandra Steele. I heard you are poor now, so you can't afford me anymore. So sad Daddy is not here to buy you anything." She said, looking haughty as hell and mean. Daddy. God. That was an ugly thing to say.

Alex steeled herself. She wasn't going to give Pam the satisfaction.

It looked like Pam hadn't heard what Logan and Alex were talking and Alex decided to use that. Pam had always been so full of herself that she never had time for anyone else.

"Oh, don't you worry your little brain, Pamela." Alex said with a smile and surreptitiously pulled the box from her bag. The ring box. It had been there since the day he had given her and this was the time. She opened it and realized it hadn't been the one he had given to Stacy.

So...

Not bad.

He had actually taken time to buy something for her instead of handing what he had brought for Stacy. That was thoughtful. Or was it because he couldn't give it away to just anyone, other than Stacy?

Maybe it is special and he ordered it especially for Stacy.

The thought stung. She blinked her eyes before she turned to Pam who was throwing rapid fire questions at Logan.

"Oh, I can afford you, alright. My Fiancé will pay you. He is kinda rich." Alex said as she readjusted Logan's ties with a smirk. "Back off. Keep your distance. Always stand two feet away. Comprendre?"

"The hell..." Pam screamed. Yes.

"Uh, I am sorry. I didn't expect her to just--" Logan started with an apologetic smile.

"Just launched herself at you and attacked you. She is like a missile. Destroying everything. I know. But you still haven't done what I had asked."

"What?"

"Whaaat?" Pam screamed.

"Listerine. Bottles of it. Or no kiss." She talked slowly and Logan stared at her lips with naked desire. So he wanted her.

She knew it. She knew he wanted her. The way his body reacted to her nearness, the way he kissed her...

But could she be okay with just that?

She had to, though.

"Yes. But I don't have listerine right now."

"The hell, Logan! You are really going to do what this bitch is--"

"Don't. Don't call her that." He sounded angry. Really angry.

This here, this was the reason why she fell in love with this man. He could be all smug and arrogant and hard headed wisdom and sometimes he did and said things that made her furious and angry and sad. But he wasn't only that!

"What happened to you?" Pam said before she stomped on her heels. God, it was so high.

"Forget that. Dresses... "

"I am not going to sell anything to her."

"What kind of foolishness is this, Pam?"

"I don't know. You tell me."

"You are being difficult."

"Am I?"

"You wanted him, didn't you? And that is why you stayed friends. Yeah, I know that look, alright."

"Alex, will you shut up?" Logan shot her a glare. "Pam, be reasonable. We need a dress for tomorrow. You both have already wasted lots of time. I just--"

"I can't stand her. She is all so-I can't Logan. Just go away."

"Come on, let's get going. I know better places than hers."

"Yeah. I know you will be going to Leclange and Levitt. Good luck finding anything that fits you." She stomped inside leaving Logan staring at Alex.

"What is that?"

"I don't like her. She doesn't like me."

"I can see that."

"And Logan, she doesn't want to be your friend. Friends don't kiss each other like that."

"She surprised me. I didn't want to kiss her."

"I know. Don't worry."

"How?"

"Because I know you want to kiss me." He sighed and then shook his head.

His gray eyes were stormy. She just wanted to get lost and never come back.

He took a step closer to her and her breathing hitched.

His eyes were on her. Her heart thundered and her legs were weak.

She wanted him.

Oh God, she wanted him right now.

She needed him.

She bit her lips as she likes up at him.

His hands were on her cheeks as he bent down and pressed a kiss against her ear. She shivered.

Her hands had mind if their own. They were on his silky mess of hair, messing them further up.

"I want to kiss you." He whispered against her cheeks, his lips teasing her already heated skin.

She gasped when he pressed his open lips against the side of her neck.

She wanted to beg him to kiss her already.

She closed her eyes when he leaned in closer. Her lips parted in anticipation. She wanted those lips on her. Now. She. Couldn't. Wait.

She could feel his hot breath inside her opened lips.

Kiss me, already, you moron.

His fingers rested over her lips and she felt like she was going to burst open. A million stars and galaxies spilling around her.

Kiss me. Kiss me.

It was like a chant.

His finger pressed against her top lip and then it was gone. She licked her lips.

He bit her ear lobe before he whispered, "but I can't kiss you, now. I haven't washed my mouth with Listerine." He pulled back.

Arrogant, stupid tease...