Chapter 9: Past

"I'd kill him myself if I ever got the chance."

I had been told that eyes were the windows to a person’s soul.

I'd never fully understood what it had meant.

Until now.

When I gazed into Will's eyes I saw his broken soul. A soul which had been forced to turn dark.

When I looked into his eyes I saw pain and anger.

So much anger.

It made me shudder. It made me afraid.

I licked my dry lips and tore my eyes away from him. His eyes followed me, scrutinizing my every move. Like a predator stalking its prey.

"Look at me Marriah." I heard his soft but firm voice. I trained my eyes on his chest, not daring to go further up.

"Look. At. Me." He said slowly. His voice was a little louder this time, full of authority.

He leaned forward, now merely a few inches away from me. My breath hitched.

"Are you afraid of me Marriah?" He said, slowly stressing on each word.

With every ounce of courage I had I looked up and met his gaze.

"No." My voice was a whisper, my lips trembled. He knew I was lying.

Honestly, I had never been more afraid of anyone in my life.

"No?" He asked raising his eyebrows mockingly.

I realized he was playing with my emotions and enjoying it. I straightened my shoulders and pulled my chin up, looking him squarely in the eyes.

"No, I'm not scared of you." My voice was clearer this time. I had to let him know that I wasn't weak.

He smirked and leaned in even closer. I could feel his breath on my face.

"You should be." He whispered in my ear.

I could feel the Goosebumps rising on my arms.

"Why?" I heard my voice speak out daringly. "Why should I be afraid of you?"

Will drew back, looking at me with amusement.

"I'm not the good man you think I am." He said, his eyes boring into mine. "I've done bad things, things that innocent mind of yours couldn't even imagine. Hell, if you knew about the things I've done you'd probably run as far away from me as possible." He let out a humorless chuckle.

And then I saw something in his eyes,

Hurt, regret and another emotion, vulnerability?

He tried to mask it, trying once again to appear as the cruel person I'd started to think he was.

"You are." I said bravely.

He looked at me, his eyebrows were drawn together.

"What?" He murmured. He looked distracted like he was thinking about something else rather than our conversation.

"You are a good man." I told him softly.

He took a sharp intake of breath, his whole attention was on me now.

"You don't know what you're talking about." His voice was bitter.

"I do." I said determination lacing my voice and before he had a chance to argue I continued, "You've defended and protected me ever since we've been here. You've saved my life more than once. You don't even know me and you've risked your life to save mine. That is my definition of a good man."

Will let out a sigh he looked at me, his eyes still filled with sorrow and regret.

"Why?" He said running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"Why do you insist on seeing good in someone who is beyond hope? Why are you so naïve?" He whispered as he closed his eyes lightly and leaned forward closing the distance between us once more.

I wasn't going to be fooled twice. He still scared me but I understood that he was a good man who had been driven into darkness by his cruel past.

He was alone, vulnerable.

I wanted to help him.

"What happened to you?" I whispered.

Will finally opened his eyes. He looked at me with an emotion I couldn't quite read but it wasn't the cold and cruel look he'd given me earlier, in fact it was far from it.

"Was it your real father?" I asked quietly. "I know something changed you. Forced you to think this way, I know on the inside you're a good man Will. Everyone has their demons but they don't make you a bad person." I said gently.

Will looked at me, he seemed to be studying me. Taking me in.

"Maybe when you have a life like mine you're forced to become a heartless monster, because eventually you realize that being good only breaks you." He said quietly.

"What happened to you?" I asked again.

Will looked at me for a while, not speaking. Then suddenly he started unbuttoning his shirt.

"W-what are you doing?" I practically screamed jumping off the bed. He looked at me, amusement evident in his eyes. However he continued to do what he was doing.

When he was finally done he slid the shirt off, not completely. Just over his broad shoulders down his nicely toned biceps down till his elbows.

Okay. Wow.

Look away, you're swooning.

I felt myself blush furiously. But as soon as my eyes trailed to his chest I gasped.

Scars covered his whole torso. A huge one ran from his chest to his abdomen. Smaller ones covered his toned stomach. Healed bullet wounds were scattered on his chest and ribs.

I felt a sob rip out of me. "Who did this to you?" I said in between sobs. "Who could be so cruel?"

Will studied me, he looked taken aback by my reaction.

"My father." he answered quietly. His voice wasn't cold like before, instead he seemed uncertain, vulnerable.

"I'm so sorry, so so sorry." I looked at him my eyes still blurry with tears.

Will shrugged his shoulders "Don't be. I don't need your sympathy."

But there was no stopping the tears rolling down my cheeks now. I walked over to the bed again and surprised myself by doing what I did next.

I hugged him.

His whole body stiffened, like he was completely foreign to the gesture but after a while he began to relax.

"I'm so sorry Will" I whispered to him again. I felt him bring his arms around me.

My whole body shuddered when I thought about it.

How could a father be heartless enough to do that to his own son?

"You didn't deserve that. No one deserves that." I said firmly, my cheek rest against his chest.

"Why do you care?" He asked pulling away from the embrace a little, his grey eyes boring into my brown ones.

And for once I didn't have an answer.

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