Chapter Seven - You're Selfish

I sighed watching a pissed Olwethu leave my office, I turned to my wife not ready to get into any fight, "baby calm down.."

"Don't baby me... now that you're cau.."

"If I was you I would thread very carefully from here and watch what I say..." I said calmly and she shook her head, "Valentia what did I do to deserve this? Her? Her again? And you didn't even have the nerve to tell me about it. So I'm over here looking like a fucken stupid idiot while my wife works with the person she cheated on me with nicely....."

"Can you sit down..and Keep your voice down too so we can talk like adults babe..."

"Don't fucken tell me what to do after the stunt you been pulling. Don't even think about it..."

I sat there and just stared at her. I was starting to get pissed because Olwethu and I were finalizing what needed to be done here.. but I kept my cool. And I honestly hated how she spoke to Olwethu, worse since we didn't even do anything wrong. I wasn't on the hiring committee... and for her to accuse me of sleeping with her...just pushed my wrong buttons.

She started pacing back and forth, "how long have you been sleeping with her?"

As much as this was getting to me, I slowly shook my head and stayed as calm as I could, "I haven't."

"Don't lie to me Valentia. You slept with her before and she was just a child then, what could stop you now from doing it again?"

"I have a wife that I respect, I know I made a mistake back then and I paid for it, but I vowed never to do it again.." I said looking right at her and she laughed, "wife.. respect... that shit didn't stop you four years ago..you slept with her..."

"Will you always refer to that Zai?? Because I am telling you that Lin and I are not sleeping together.. the last time I did I almost lost everything including my freedom... So why would I do it again!!"

"So how did she get the darn job.. did she sleep with someone here.. did she sweet talk you into hiring her."

I got up, "Zai don't.. don't piss me off. Do not piss me off and stop trying to find fault in me..."

"You kept it from me Valentia, and ."

I nodded, "oh yeah I did.. I mean I tried telling you first day and you just wanted me to fuck you and second time you actually couldn't stop talking about how great fucken green would look in a room for our future kids... I tried telling you but the only thing you care about is what you want and what you love Zai. Screw everyone else......"

"That is not what's going on babe and you know it.. you should have fucken told me regardless... she has been working here for over a month" she said.

"Oh now I'm babe? You're fucken accusing me of shit and then call me babe?"

"Valentia what am I supposed to think. I walk in here and you and your ex are..."

"What? We are what? Fucking? Or working?" I asked starting to be pissed off again.

She just looked at me and said nothing, then I took that as my chance to rant, "Zai for the past four years I have been doing nothing but prove myself and my loyalty to you... I don't blame you for that, it was my fault because I was unfaithful to you but for you to now do this shit??? I have learnt my lesson.. God I almost lost everything..."

"Valen...."

"Shut the fuck up and listen to me.  You've been talking now it's time I fucken do the talking...!" I said sternly and she kept quiet.

"I almost lost everything.. my career, I lost my fucken dream job...that's on me too, but I fought for you and since you forgave me I have promised myself never to do what I did and I lived up to that.. now for you to walk in here and bitch about something you don't know..." I was now on my feet looking at her.

"Valentia what would you think if you were in my shoes.."

"That I'm some selfish bitch who only cares about herself. I asked you for a child over a year ago, we are not getting any younger and I wanna start a family but you tell me about your career this and that... I make friends and you fucken get mad because they don't qualify to be your friends coz they are parents, I wanna fucken tell you about my day at work and you shut me up with shit that excites you and everything that's happening in your life.. because every fucken thing is about you Zai.. only you matter, your needs and everything is about you..."

"No... don't say that.. all I'm asking is how the fuck did she get this job...?"

"How am I supposed to know? You managed to calculate how long she's been working here.. you can figure that shit out.. but let me tell you one thing.. other people out here work their asses off to get to where they are today. Olwethu got that job fair and square and she is fucken good at it... it wasn't handed to her the way you got the position you are in right now..."

"So you are going to fucken take her side... Valentia I am your fucken wife and you pick that bitch and let her come in between us again???"

I shook my head, "you're coming in between us... and you know what, think whatever you wanna think and say whatever you wanna say.. I'm done with you here.."

"Vale..."

"Get the fuck out of my office."

I saw something flinch in her and she turned on her heels and left.

I sat on my dest and put my hands on my face. This was just fucked up. Really fucked up.

My mind then shifted to Olwethu and how she looked when she left my office. I sighed and got up quickly going to check up on her.

When I reached her door, she was collecting her staff..

I knocked and got in when she didn't respond.

"Olwethu..."

"Don't... I know we fucked up back then but I do not fucken deserve to be talked at like that. She might be your wife but she can't fucken talk to me like that Valentia.."

I sighed, she was angry and hurt.

"I know Lin... I'm really sorry she shouldn't have said all that.. I'm really sorry.."

She stopped zipping up her bag and looked at me, "she fucken asked what I was doing here.. Valentia don't you fucken talk to your wife. And for her to think I slept my way to getting this position. That's pure fuckery right there!"

I sighed, shit.. I couldn't say anything that would show that my marriage was in trouble, so I walked to her and put my hand on her shoulder then I lied, "I told her.. she probably wasn't expecting to see you after hours. Olwethu I'm sorry. You know you got this job fair and square.. I'm really sorry.."

She shook her head and took her bag.. when she touched the door knob I called for her, "Olwethu..."

She turned around, "yes..."

"You really deserve this job and you're pretty great at it... don't listen to her..And I'm sorry again..."

She smiled, "thank you.. means a lot."

I smiled too, "drive safe and tomorrow we definitely have to be sure about our decision okay.."

"Drive safe too..." then she left.

I went back to my office and started gathering packing my staff then went to my car then drove home.

I was a still a bit shaken and hoped Zai wouldn't talk about the shit that went down at work..

I arrived back home and didn't see her, the car was here so she was not far. I put my things and went to take a bath. 

When I got back to our bedroom she was there sitting.

"Hey..." I said and she just looked at me. Great now she wasn't going to talk?

I took my shorts and then got ready for bed.

"So we won't even talk about this..."

"No..." I said simply.

"How you defended that kid is worrying me Valentia."

"How you're talking to me now is fucken worrying me.. why do you want me to fucken admit into something I'm not responsible for??? You're acting like someone who's trying to hide their guilty conscious by punning their shit on me."

Something flinched in her and she looked very uneasy. But I was mad so I kept going..

"You're my wife, I come back home to you everyday, I work my ass off to make sure you have everything and more than what you want..  I made a mistake I know but I have been paying for that for the past four years and I did not even fucken do anything wrong right now.. but you treat me like I fucked her again." I said getting pissed.

"You hid her..."

"Didn't we talk about this Zai.. about how self centered and selfish you have been and have hardly been paying attention to anything I want. I want a baby, you brushed that off, I tell you about my day you fucken brush that off, I tell you about who they hired and you brush that off, but then you come running to me and talk about hiding shit when you don't even allow me to say something.." I yelled a bit and she sighed, "can we not talk about the child thing Valentia..."

"Why Zai... I have been keeping shit to myself trying so hard not to fuck up so you cam be happy. Pushing my happiness to the side and this is how you fucken thank me.. noo man! Fuck no! You are refusing for me to get the only thing that I'm asking from you.. only thing.. don't piss me off now by accusing me of shit I didn't do."

"Vee.."

"You know very well that you and I were in Los Angeles during that weekend when they were hiring.. how the fuck did she sleep with me or sweet talk me coz when I arrived she was already hired, which left me in shock too... I was with you in that fucken conference Zai.."

"I am not selfish.. I devoted my life to you only for you to fucken cheat with a flippin kid Valentia.. then you come here and tell me about you having a wife and respecting that.. don't you fucken dare call me selfish when you was selfish by having sex with a 17 year old... You've done this before, what can fucken stop you from doing it again!"

I got up and stood right in front of her, leaving no space between us, I was now pissed to the limit and didn't even want to hear any shit from her mouth.

She took a few steps back until she was pinned against the wall.

I was breathing heavily trying by all means to calm my nerves but shit wasn't working.

I looked at her, "Don't you ever.. and I mean never fucken talk to me like that again.. ever..!"

Then I turned around to leave. I saw a glass of water that was on the headboard. I hit it with my hand and heard it shutter on the floor.. 

Fuck!

..

When I woke up my hand felt like shit. I was swollen a bit and it hurt like hell. I took a bath and then headed straight to work.

I know sleeping with Olwethu was wrong and I paid for that and vowed never to put myself in that position no matter how hard it was. But for her to treat me like this, be selfish and not give a damn about what I wanted. It was just fucked up..

And to think she walked into that office yesterday and assumed the worst... I put up with a lot of shit in the sake of having or maintaining peace.. but I reached my limit. I was fucken tired.

I arrived at work and went up to the office. Olwethu was already there.

I went to her office, "can we finish this up.. you need to call winners on Friday."

She smiled, "yes boss and thank you I'll gladly call them..."

I nodded and headed to my office. She joined me a few minutes later and we finally finalized on what was what.. which made me happy and I was confident that the stories she picked would sell.

The following days were slow as hell and Zai and I were hardly talking. It was crazy. I wanted is to talk and try to find a solution but she was acting as if she wasn't wrong all in this. Like I was the only one who fucks up all the time.

She'd come back home late and I'd ask where she was and the only answer I'd get would be meeting.

I didn't pay much attention to it... and to my surprise after I asked that Zai came around and started talking to me. I talked back and promised to actually talk things out the following day..

On Thursday after work I got home tired as fuck...

I needed one loooong bath and sleeping. Today was going to be exciting and I as looking forward to the book launches..

I went to the bath and Zai joined when I was done. After I cleaned up I went to sit in our bed. I took my phone and looked at my emails. I reminded a few media houses of the announcement of the winner and they confirmed.

My wife's phone started vibrating. I slowly went to it and I saw a pop up message. It was an image with the caption YESTERDAY WAS FUCKEN AMAZING, THIS MISSES YOUR TOUCH ALREADY..

For a fucken few seconds my eye sight went blind and then it came back. I couldn't see the picture since the phone was locked...

I took in onw deep breath and then tried opening the phone and to my biggest surprise she changed the code. 

I tried to calm down. Maybe I fucken pressed the wrong code since the caption on this got to me.

I tried slowly again and punched in our wedding date and year and month and it fucken wrote..

WRONG PASSWORD YOU HAVE T 3 TRIES LEFT...

I felt like my chest was closing in... I looked at the caption again.. and immediately the shower stopped running.

Maybe.. maybe it's not what I was thinking.

I tried to calm myself down...

She slowly came back from the shower and I looked at her still holding the phone.

Immediately when she saw it on my phone, something changed..

"What is it...?" She asked in almost a whisper and I walked right to her, "put in the password.."

"Valentia... what..."

"Put your fucken password here or I swear to God I will smash this phone and smash you too..."

I was fuming. Her refusing kinda confirmed this. It was exactly what I was praying it wouldn't be.

She swallowed and took the phone then put the password.

"Give it to me..."

"Baby..."

"Give me your fucken phone Zai Louw..."

She gave me the phone, "look babe I can explain... it was a once of thing.  A stupid mistake.."

I haven't even looked at the darn picture and she was already trying to explain. I took the phone and opened the image. It was indeed a naked picture of a woman.. 

My hands began to shake and I felt like my head was spinning. My chest was absolutely closing in on me. I felt like someone was sucking the same breath I was trying to inhale.

It vibrated again and it was a message from a

GAIL: Am I still seeing you tonight babe? ??

I shook my head, "who's Gail and Samantha?"

Tears started showing on her eyes, "look.. I.. I.. they are no bodies.. just some..."

"People you occasionally exchange sex with and come back to accuse me of doing shit I haven't been doing?" I yelled and her body flinched.

Right about now I'd even be scared of myself. I felt like I wasn't me.

"Baby it's not like that.. Okay.. I swear.. I... it was a mistake.."

"One mistake with two fucken people.. Zai do you take me for a fucken fool? Am I written Dick Head right here.. am I stupid..???"

"I'm sorry..."

"How long...?"

She shook her head, "Valentia please.. I'm..."

"Don't fuck with me woman don't.. how long??"

I started pacing back and forth, this was just pissing me off...

"It's been a while..."

I shook my head suddenly crushed.. I had no fucken energy in me..

"Are you fucken kidding me?"

"I'm sorry..."

"You're sorry Zai? Were you trying to make yourself feel better by trying to pin and throw this Olwethu affair I had four years ago? Were you trying to fucken get even.. ease your conscious...?"

She kept quiet and sobbed.

I turned to leave but she held held my hand.

"Baby please....don't.."

I quickly yanked it away cutting her sentence short and pushed her against the wall.. suddenly, horror was written in her eyes.

I hit the wall behind her and felt every bone on my hand move... then I shook my head before whispering,

"Don't! Don't even mention that!"