Chapter One

Cassandra sobbed again as she leaned on the table. She is facing a mug with a face print of her ex-boyfriend Julius' face. This is the immodest man who has broken her heart today. The man she loved so much and was the prospect of becoming a wife. She continued sobbing as she glared at the mug of her gaze.

"Oh sha here, you drink coffee first, you looks cold to the corpse." Her friend Margarita criticized the mug of hot water. She was served 3 in 1 coffee and then pulled a chair in front of her.

"Is there no creamer at all?" She sat up and wiped her tears from her eyes.

"Don't look for a creamer; I haven't been able to go shopping. The mall will open tomorrow at nine o'clock." Cassandra's face frowned sharply.

"Is coffee also bitter?" She did not want to whine and rudely put the teaspoon inside the mug.

"Why is it that you tend to rush to the boarding house so early? I’m still wearing sleeping clothes." Her friend who was obviously confused by her sudden arrival.

She is currently looking for grief at her friend, Margarita's boarding house. This was immediately the first thing she talked about her and Julius breaking up a week ago. And of course because the two of them are really close, she just goes in and out of her boarding house, proposing what she should do.

"Until now! It still hasn't sunk there in your dead brain that your ogre-like boyfriend has replaced you?" Margarita preached to her. She's a determined and strong woman, Marga knows that, this is the first time she cried. The hell, which woman is strong after only one week since the break-up and what's worse, is the person you thought was your partner for life.

She leaned back and now tears welled up in her eyes again.

"It really hurts. You know I really loved Julius, right? We were also three years in this relationship and during those three years I did not look at others."

"There you have it! Because you are not looking at others so you are too blinded by your love for him. Do you know the saying the more focus you are on that single thing the more vulnerable you are. See, you are not aware that there are other mushroom crawling on your ex. “ it mocked her then swallowed the contents of the mug.

"So I'm still missing something Marga. Gosh, where did I go wrong I gave him everything. Is my love for that asshole still lacking?" Her forehead grew narrower, her hair was sticky and she grab the mug and drink carelessly.

"You know what. That's you're a problem because you gave Julius your love so much that he got bored. You should not give your one hundred percent to the man because they will think that you are too attached to them so they can easily leave. You should not be the only one contributing to your relationship, both parties should. You get it. "She followed her friend's gaze to the sink with her mug.

"Is that why Oppa is still with you?" She asked with a sigh of relief. She saw a sudden flare of sadness in her friend's eyes but it also disappeared immediately.

"Exactly, I didn't give them motives to find me boring. You should give spice that is new to the man every now and then so they don't leave." a friend leaned in front of him in the sink. "Look at Oppa and me, it's been four years and counting." What her friend "Oppa" is referring to is her half Korean boyfriend.

"Am I boring, Marga?" she asked depressingly.

"I shouldn't answer that. I guess you already know what I will answer there." she turned back on her and gargled.

She just stopped; she wiped the small tears from her eyes. Cassandra, tried to think back to what was wrong with her relationship with Julius. As much as she wanted, she wanted to know which part of her three years of flirting with the man was wrong. After all, a man will not look for others if he has no shortcomings.

She sobbed again as she remembered. She could not think of a reason, all she ever did was to love Julius all the time. When she met him at the mall where she worked three years ago when she landed in Manila, they easily became friends, they made an instant closeness that later turns into love. She thought at first that Julius fell from heaven for her. Although she did not know much about the man or his father who died early as she was told, she accepted it wholeheartedly. But why does the man speak painfully when breaking up with her, from the words the man spitted is as if they have nothing in common.

"Cas, i want to end all of this here and now."

"W-what, I-i mean w-why?"

"I am not happy anymore. I can no longer see the spark we had before." Cassandra coughed suddenly. She felt heavy.

"What do you mean by that Julius? The spark is still there, I can still feel it. I still feel we can still fight it." She implied with a grain of tear in her eyes.

"Cas, listen, I did everything I could to make this relationship work and last long. I did everything to save this relationship, I did what I could- no, i tried ... what I could but not anymore in this state of the relationship. "

"What mood do you want then Jul? I will adjust. I will do as you say." Cassandra frowned as she rubbed her boyfriend's hand tightly.

"Cas, listen ..." Julius thrust his hand. "It isn't about the mood, it isn't about who's going to adjust. I really don't want to, and I don't want to stay in a relationship where I am not happy anymore. I know I have made a big mistake with you. But I don't want to add to my shortcomings with you by staying in this relationship." Cassandra's eyes widened. Tears welled up in her eyes. She just bent down while listening to what Julius was saying to her.

Of all the pains and heartbreaks she have imagined to come, she could not predict what Julius would do to her. Inside her brain the negativity had no place in their relationship.

At least that was her view until this very cursed day. She did not expect that her fiancé who court her 24/7 would break up with her, adding his lovely pick-up lines that further melted her arid heart. His constant picking on her after his duty and its gifts further melted her arid heart. It was as if she was lifted up to heaven and kissed the cloud of those moments, but that was also the height of his downfall on earth.

For several years, their relationship went smoothly. The first years, were as sweet as honey and as sticky as the lime. She and Julius hang-outs like most of the couples do. Not a week goes by without the two going for a walk and dating. At the end of the month they are at their favorite resto and at night she will ride Julius' motorbike to the top of the mountain to watch the colorful lights in the city. They called that place their private paradise, the paradise that soon became her worst and greatest nightmare. The spot she thought to be romantic is the same spot today that made her cry, here Julius left her.

"Jul tell me, is your reason for separation really because there is no spark or there is another reason."

"Cas, are you accusing me of something? Just accept that we are no longer together. We are over and I do not want to talk things private to you anymore, you are out of it."

"Julius, I just want you to be honest with me. I want you to tell me the truth; I want to know if I really am at fault." Cassandra was already focused on Julius without blinking her eyes staring at her boyfriend.

"Cas, let's not talk about this now ..."

"No, let's talk this now, because I do not know Julius where I go wrong with you. I want that my mind will be free even if it hurts, I do not want to carry the burden alone because I have a big shortcoming." She heard Julius's weak exhalation; she concluded that the man had a different reason for breaking up with her.

"Cassandra listen, whatever my reasons is, you are out of it. What I just want is to get this over with. I don't love you anymore, the spark is gone and I want you to know and accept that. I don't want you to be bitter because of me. "

"Come again? Bitter? Me? Do you hear yourself, yes I did love you but I'm not bitter. I may look like one but I won't stop you even if it hurts." She rubbed her eyes.

"Then that's good Cas, I hope we can be great friends after this." Cassandra could not answer what Julius had said. After the man told her, he is the one who has the courage to say that they will be friends.

Gosh, this man is really something else. Julius and her are unlikely to be friends again. When two people are separated, they only know each other but can no longer be friends. Cassandra thought that friends are the one you can run to in time of need but you cannot run for help because it became your headache and the one who left you. That is her perspective whether the relationship has closure or not.

"Bye, Julius and thank you." That was the last thing she said to the beaten boyfriend who is now her ex. She knew it sounds a bit odd but thanking the man for the three years they were together was the only thing she did. After that, Julius did not contact her again, they are breaking up but he did not really clarify what the reason for that break-up was. All she ever knew was because her boyfriend got tired of her.

"Cas? Cassandra? Cassandra Jilonan!" She was shocked to feel that she had been slapped on the back by her friend Margarita.

"I thought you were able to move on with that asshole. From the words you told me you said you are not bitter with him. What is this Cassandra I see now eh. The hell, one week has already passed. I’m sure that your ex is playing in another cradle. While you are here looking like a worn-out spinach. "

"I just told Julius that because he questioned my love for him. I was just carried away because I felt like he was just and ease that I would not be able to live without him."

"Which is really true" Her friend implied. Cassandra clenched her fist. But not because she is angry or what, it is because she said the opposite to Julius the way she feels now. The truth is that she is having a hard time moving on, because she and Julius have been together for three years and one week of mourning is not enough to erase all the memories of her ex-boyfriend in her brain.

"Oh what now? You'll just stare at it and you'll just wait there girl to have a menopause. Come on, loosen up Cas, you're single it's a day to be celebrated because you are no longer part of the GOMBURZA clan. You aren't a martyr anymore you have your own time. There are other women out there who in a relationship dreaming of having freedom like you. "

She couldn't help but think of what Margarita had told her. She grabbed the handle of the mug and drank the black coffee. She frowned in bitterness. Tastes like her love life, she resounded.

Her attention was averted towards the face of the two of them painted on the mug.

"I don't think I can really forget him Marga, I don't know but Julius seems to be my life too." Tears welled up in her eyes, her friend held her.

"Cassandra, you know I'm just concerned about you. You are one of my closest friends, so I don't want to see you upset especially that stupid tears from your eyes just because of that man."

"Thank you Marga. I didn't have the courage to do this alone. I really love Julius. I loved him so much that forgetting him is so much hard." The friend approached him and stroked her back.

"I undertand."

"Let’s stop this drama, I don't want to cry, I'm getting tired. It seems like I've been doing this for one week." She went to the sink and hurled the mug into the sink. Fortunately, that did not break.

"By the way did you throw the memorabilia of Julius that I told you. Did you do that?" She could not answer; she was ashamed to tell her friend that she had not. The moment Julius broke up with her was painful enough to throw away the picture frames, pillows, stuff toys and things that Julius gave her. She even ripped the pick-up lines of the wreckage he had been busy laminating before. She even got to the point where she put them in the trash can and thought of burning them. However, the other side of her brain tells her not to do that. She also repaired what she cut. Cassandra is still hoping that Julius will come back to her. And the mug she threw in the sink was already included in Julius' memorabilia.

"Cas, tell me. Have you thrown it away?"

"How can I, Marga, it's only been one week that’s why I haven't thrown everything away yet."

"Everything can’t be thrown away? Or did you not really do it? One week is enough time to do some spring cleaning.” There is a threat to her friend's tone.

"Marga, I will do it. Maybe it's not today yet. Maybe I will do that if I can. Maybe as of now let me unwind first."

"Unwind? How long? One year? Two years? Por dios por santo Cassandra, while you were mourning there, your ex is already feasting there. Much worse is that tomorrow he will suddenly announce the wedding." Cassandra is depressed, her friend has a point. Her friend always has a point, when it comes to him she becomes an expert in love. She did not answer yet. She went to her friend's fridge and scooped up cold water.

"Okay, I won't bother you with your belongings anymore. But as for this mug, I'll take care of it. After all it’s in my power, this will be the first thing I will erase from your memory."

"Marga, what are you going to do with that mug. Marga ... let go of that" She was even more nervous as the mug was up in the air.

"Because ..."

"Cassandra, this mug is unlucky so it should just be broken, to get rid of the bad luck."

"Marga no!" She cried out with her eyes wide as she heard the mug being torn to pieces. "

"Oh, there it is. Hand me the dustpan." Marga casually spoke to her.

"Marga, what did you do?" Tears welled up in her eyes. She knelt down and crawled on the floor to pick up the small pieces of cracked mug.

"Cassandra, how can you forget about him if you can’t even lose that mug? Don't mourn that, I'm sure Julius drifted the things you gave him for a long time in the river." She grab some water for her. Actually, she is not angry with her friend. She really only regrets the price of the mug from Italy, because it is also dollars. She just put their face on the mug.

"It's not that I don't want to move on Marga, the mug is expensive."

"All right, I'll buy you a new one. The one without your face with that douchebag." Her friend said while preparing fried eggs. She in turn cleaned the table. She decided to have breakfast here.

The two of them were already sitting and ready to eat when her cellphone rang. Her friend stopped looking at her. She did not able to read the caller name and stuck it to her ear.

"Hello ..." the other line did not answer immediately. "Hello?"

"Hi Cas," When the voice registered with the speaker she was speechless. Julius called her.

"What do you need Julius?" She tried to be rude but in reality she wanted to give up.

"I have something to tell you." She was especially nervous. “Can we see each other?" Her friend raised an eyebrow, because the phone was on loudspeaker so she could hear what Julius was saying to her.

"O-Okay." She saw her friend's hair stroking and shaking at the same time. The line was immediately cut off.

"See that's what I'm telling you. The speed you give in to that stupid"

"Maybe Julius has something important to tell me." She replied.

"And you believed in that swindler."

"Why not meet Marga, just talk, right? I have nothing else to say to him."

"I will come."

"Why?" Her forehead furrowed.

"To make sure you don't look miserable and defeated to him. To stop you from being reckless, maybe you will beg for that jerk." She knew she is weak when it comes to Julius. Just a little bit of Julius winked at her, she would surely give in.

"O-okay." They have resumed eating. Inside Cassandra's heart she felt bad. But part of her wants to see Julius once more.