FOUR

Trevor got back to L.A., relieved the limo was waiting outside baggage claim to take him home because he hadn’t slept and was basically in a daze.

He’d gotten back to the cabin and seen that her car wasn’t out front and panic had shot through him. Inside, on the bed, was her note.

Trevor, I wanted another night but I can’t face leaving you tomorrow morning. I can’t pretend that it’s okay that I won’t ever see you again. I can’t pretend that I don’t love you and I can’t beg. I can’t be what you want and you can’t be what I want so let’s have Lake Cushman and popsicles be one of those memories that summers are made of.

Please be well and make sure your new PA knows you need healthy lunches.

Love, Tess

He’d stared at the note, a roaring in his ears. She’d left without saying goodbye? Damn it, how could she?

He’d shown up at SeaTac early, storming to her gate only to wait in vain as her plane left without her on it.

His house felt empty when he walked into it that afternoon. Shaking his head, he looked out over the pool to the small pool house that he’d had converted to an office. The place where Tess would arrive at nine every morning and stay until seven every night.

Not able to face seeing that place without her in it, he called down there to let his new PA know he was back. And he thanked her for sending the limousine for him. He made mistakes before, the least he could do was remember to thank his damned assistant.

* * * * *

Trevor had already planned to be gone for six weeks to shoot a movie in Toronto right after his return from the lake. Gratefully, it kept him from driving past Tess’ house every day.

Damn it, he missed her. Not the way she kept his life in order, but her. The sound of her voice, the way she laughed. He had no one to share things with the way he’d done with her. Those days at the lake became more than a fond memory, they became a touchstone.

While on the shoot, his very attractive costar had sent him all the right signals and he’d even tried to work up an interest but he couldn’t. He saw Tess’ simple smile instead. Tasted her skin on his lips. She was burned into him like a brand.

He’d always thought he had enough money to have everything. Working damned hard, he got past a childhood of privation to an adulthood where his every fantasy was within reach. But the realization came to him with terribly clarity that Tess Marshall was a very fine thing and someone utterly priceless to him. She was it. The one true thing. A woman who knew him and loved him anyway. Knew his flaws up close and personal and accepted them. He was too old and she was too special for him to miss out on having her as his woman because of stupid expectations of other people.

At the end of the shoot he got on a plane and headed straight for Westwood.

* * * * *

Tess had returned home from Lake Cushman and waited. She was sure Trevor would show up at her door within a few days but he hadn’t. She told herself it was for the best and it was, but it still hurt.

Two months had passed and the summer faded into the fall, although in L.A. there wasn’t much difference. Still, Tess felt further and further away from those idyllic days beside the lake.

She didn’t take a full-time PA job again. Instead she joined an event planning firm part-time and enrolled in school. She’d meant to finish college but it remained one of those things on her to do list until then.

Thankfully, she had enough connections from working with Trevor that she was able to find a spot at UCLA and began to attend classes. Her house was paid for, her expenses other than school were small and she began to settle into a life totally different than what she’d had before and she discovered she loved economics. Who knew?

So she’d pulled back into her driveway in her traded-down car—no use having a Lexus to go to college in—and saw his Porsche sitting there. Her heart leapt. But she steeled herself. She’d learned that she could live with her new life. Yes, she still loved him but she could live without him if she tried. Didn’t mean it was easy, she missed him like crazy. But she couldn’t live without her self-respect.

Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her backpack and got out, walking to the porch where he sat.

Damn he looked good. Better than she remembered. He had a bit of a beard and his hair was too long, but he looked warm and handsome and oh god how she loved him.

“Hi.”

He stood. “Hi. Can I come in?” He motioned toward the door.

Swallowing hard, she nodded. “Sure.” After she unlocked the door, he followed her inside. Kicking off her shoes, she tossed the backpack on the table and turned to find him only inches away.

“You look good,” he murmured, stepping closer.

Her heart shot into her throat at his nearness. “You look tired. Handsome, but tired. You just finish a shoot?”

Smiling softly, he reached out to cup her cheek. “You know me so well. I just got back two hours ago. Dropped my stuff at home and came straight here. I’ve asked around, who are you working for? No one will admit to poaching the best PA ever.”

“I went back to school. I think I’m going to get my degree in economics. I may do an MBA. In the meantime, I’m working a few nights a week and weekends for an event planning company. It pays my bills.”

“I really have to kiss you, Tess.”

She gulped and tried to step back but the table was to her right and the wall directly behind her. “I don’t think that’s such a good idea, Trev.” Yeah, could she be less convincing?

“Why is that? Are you seeing someone else? Have your feelings for me changed?” He stepped forward again so that his body was now flush with hers, his arms braced on the wall to either side of her head.

“I…uh, no. No to both questions. But that doesn’t change the situation, Trevor.”

“The situation is changed, Tess. The life I live without you in it is a shadow. It’s pale and watery. And lonely. But the life with you in it? It’s vivid and beautiful and living and breathing and damn it, I love you. I want you to be with me.”

Hope, a tiny ember of it, sparked within her. Okay, there were other things sparking to life too, but hope was more important than lust.

“Your silence is freaking me out, Tess.”

“I love you, too, Trevor. But,” she put out a hand to stop him from swooping in for a kiss, “what are you offering? Because I haven’t changed my mind about not wanting to be some kind of dirty, back-office secret. I can’t watch you on the red carpet with other women. I want to be in your life, openly.”

“I want you there, too. I want you to marry me. I’ve called the Lake Cushman

Lodge, they do weddings there, did you know that?”

For the life of her, Tess could not find words so she shook her head.

“No? No you won’t marry me?” He looked so crestfallen that she quickly kissed him, holding his face in her hands.

“Are you sure you want to marry me? Because I’m old-fashioned, Trevor. Having a clit piercing does not mean I don’t expect you to be faithful.”

He threw back his head and laughed. “Of course. And babe, I plan to have you keep me far too busy to stray. Even if I wanted to, which I don’t. You’re it.”

“Then why did you wait so long?”

The hurt in her eyes tore at him. “I’m sorry. I left for the shoot a few days after returning from the lake. I wanted to come get you every day since I found the cabin empty. I was hurt when you left but I understand why you did. I couldn’t have offered you forever then. I loved you that last night but I was afraid to say it. Afraid to let myself be known enough to love you. So I needed to work it through, be absolutely sure, because you deserve utter devotion and certainty. Every moment of the last two months has been filled with you. All of my dreams, each breath. All you. Will you let me give you forever, Tess? Can you give it to me in return?”

She took a deep breath. “Yes.”

“Thank god!” Grinning, he moved his hands to the waist of her jeans and quickly undid them, shoving them down her legs.

The dam of longing between them broke and suddenly it was all hands and mouths and teeth and writhing as they sought to divest each other of clothing.

Greedily, he took her mouth in a kiss so devastating that she went weak over it. His lips brushed hers and then seduced her mouth open, tongue flowing inside to slide sinuously over hers.

Roving hands found her breasts, rolling and pinching the nipples until she was trembling with need. His cock thrust through her fist, the sticky warmth of his pre-cum spread to her belly.

“Inside me,” she gasped. “If you don’t fuck me now I’ll die.”

“Just a little death,” he said with a chuckle and spun her body, pushing her stuff on the table to the side and laying her on it, legs dangling off the side. “I’ve dreamt of that beautiful pussy every day. I’m going to eat you first, then I’ll fuck you. We may even make it to your bed. I can’t make promises just yet.”

“Oh dear,” she whispered as he leaned over her and put her hands above her head and had her grasp the far end of the table.

“Hold on, Tess, my love.”

She didn’t have time to laugh as he spread her legs wide and pulled the lips of her pussy apart. He blew softly over that swollen, wet flesh and she whimpered.

“That’s the way, baby. I want you writhing and whimpering. I’ve waited so long for this.” Two fingers slid into her cunt as his tongue slowly circled her clit. He hooked the fingers and found her sweet spot, making her cry out with pleasure and arch into his face.

No more words from him then as he got down to the very serious work of eating her pussy. He loved the way she tasted, loved the way she felt against his lips and tongue. Her response to him—that sweet and genuine reaction—was soothing and sensual at the same time. His Tess was flame against his mouth but real. So fucking sexy.

Her clit hardened and swelled and he could no longer deny the lure of that little silver ring. Taking it between his teeth, he tugged it gently and followed up with a stroke to the underside of her clit with rapid flicks of his tongue.

She was close. The trembling of her thighs told him that. He made her this way. Triumph and possessiveness roared through him as orgasm hit her and he claimed her heart and soul.

“You got some mad skills there,” she gasped.

God he’d missed her sense of humor. “Yeah, I’m wicked skilled.” He rolled the condom on one-handed as she sat up and moved her ass to the edge of the table. Good thing it was oak and heavy or it may not have been up to the beating it was taking.

“Oh!”

He slid into her completely. God, had anything ever felt this good before? Her pussy was made for him, her body made to fit against his. Her legs wrapped around his waist, opening her fully and pulling him closer.

“And the right height, too. We’ll have to move it to the house. I don’t think my table is very good for fucking.” He grunted as he began to slowly thrust into her.

“Yes, my Grandma Marshall’s oak table will look right at home in your dining room that’s larger than my entire house.”

“Oh hush. It’s our house and our dining room and I rather like this table. Now let me fuck you. I’ve been dreaming of this for two months now.”

Putting her palms flat on the table behind her body, she arched her back and received him. Her gaze bore straight into his, right into his heart and soul.

“You’ll need one of those hands. I want you to make yourself come. I did so love watching you do that when we were in our cabin.”

Sucking her finger to wet it, she slid a hand down to her pussy and stroked over her clit, gasping and moaning as she played with the ring.

“I love the way your cunt grips me when you do that.” He moved to take a nipple between his teeth, his tongue stroking it as he bit down gently.

The fat head of his cock stroked inside her, making her nerves sing in time to the mouth on her nipple and the fingers on her clit. His unique smell filled her senses. Leaning down, she kissed the top of his head, his cool, silky hair against her lips.

She couldn’t wait, she was a terrible masturbator because she never made herself wait. Her orgasm broke around his cock and she loved the way he groaned. Knowing she affected him that way touched her deeply. Made her feel like a goddess.

“My god, your cunt is like a fucking fist. Hold on, baby.”

Putting her hands back where they’d been before, she arched and took him into herself over and over. Tiny ripples of orgasmic pleasure rolled through her with each thrust of his cock.

He thrust so hard and so deep that her breasts began to bounce and her breath caught as she saw the look on his face as he watched. So much desire for her.

“Yes, oh yeah. I love you, Tess.” The words left his mouth followed by one last, deep thrust as he came.

Moments later, he pulled out and pressed a kiss to her collarbone. “I’ll be right back and then I think we should order pizza to refuel. ‘Cause then I’m going to fuck you proper-like in your bed. I’ve got a wad of condoms and a cock that can’t seem to get enough of you. Are you up for the challenge?” He grinned but then got a bit serious. “It will be hard sometimes, you know, being my wife. But I’m dedicated to you, Tess. We’ll make it work.”

She hopped off the table and tiptoed up to kiss him. “We will. ‘Cause I’ll have to kill you if we don’t.” Winking, she sashayed past him to the phone and joy surged through him at his unexpected fortune.