3: Helping Hands

After a Sunday full of searching, we finished, stopping as the clouds roll in meaning it's going to rain. The wind picks up as the rain falls, blowing the cold water everywhere.

"Charlotte Rae," Belle calls, "you're going to get sick." I turn to see her beckoning me away from the balcony. I don't blame her, the cold air sends a chill through my bones.

"I want to run in the rain, but I know it's no good for me," I call back. I back up out of the balcony and close the double doors, pulling the curtains closed. Sighing, I walk to the living room and plop myself down on the couch.

Belle was sitting criss-cross engrossed in one of her stupid romance novels. After staring at her for a good 10-minutes, I take one of the decorative pillows and chuck it at her, flinging the book out of her hands and sending her hair everywhere. "Hey!" She yells, "I don't even know what page I was on."

"Sucks to suck," I stick my tongue out at her.

"Wouldn't you like to know," she mumbles loud enough for me to hear her. I grab the pillow that was behind me at chuck it at her, again. I burst out into a fit of giggles. Once they pass, I sprawl out on the couch sighing over dramatically. "What's up your ass, King?"

"I'm so bored! It's-" I turn to look at the Cable Box time, "4:17 and we're stuck at home doing absolutely nothing!"

"Hm," Belle thought. "How about we watch a movie?" I shake my head, disagreeing. "30-second dance party?" I shake my head, again, at the Grey's Anatomy Reference. "Bean Leaf?" I shake my head, for the third time, but this time an idea pops it in.

"Hey," I sit up, "How about the mall?"

"Yeah, I don't see why not?" Belle agrees quietly. I could see a little unwillingness and I know what it's from. We actually haven't been to the mall since before Amelia has gone missing.

"It'll be like old times, don't worry about it," I remind her. I stand up and give her a kiss on her forehead, "let's go get dressed, I'll let you wear one of my cute rompers." Her eyes brighten at the idea of wearing my clothes, I laugh and run my room with Belle following suit.

For a Sunday afternoon, the mall was empty. I'd expect people to go around shopping, but instead, it's completely barren. The only people that were there were a few roaming associates and parents with their young children.

Belle and I pass by Forever 21 and before I can object, she grabs my hands and drags me in there. My maroon romper fits her athletic body like a glove and I notice guys noticing it as well.

I roll my eyes in disgust, "băieți răi la ora trei (boyette ray la or•ah trey)." Belle and I both learned Romanian to warn each other about things we didn't want others to head. As this time, there were boys gawking at her at 3-o'clock.

At my information, Belle shot them a dirty look, only to stop in her tracks. It was a group of four guys with two girls. I followed Belle's eyes to recognize two of the guys. One of them was from Tuesday and the other was from the restaurant. I could feel Belle's discomfort, so instinctively, I stood in front of her and shot all of them a dirty look, only for the girls to shoot me one back.

"Back off, bitch," one of the girls said. I so badly wanted to tell her off, but I controlled myself and rolled my eyes. I turned to face Belle as one of the guys growled at her.

"Fucking weirdos," I grumbled in Romanian. Belle finally dropped her gaze and mumbled for us to go somewhere else.

As we walked out, I heard footsteps coming towards us, I turned around to see the man from the restaurant rescue come up to us. "Hello," he greeted with a funny accent, "I'm sorry for my friend, she's really possessive of her boyfriend and just didn't like the fact that you rolled your eyes at him."

I could pinpoint his accent, but I didn't care, I was too upset. "Well, you shouldn't have been gawking at my friend. Plus, that guy you're with, the one with the tanned skin, stresses her the fuck out, so please tell him back off. Thanks," I tried to tell him kindly.

He nodded curtly and turned around, walking to this little posse. I walked out with Belle hand-in-hand, directed her over to the rolled ice cream shop. She looked calmer than she did at the store and that calmed me down as well. I hated whenever my friends feel upset because I want nothing more than to take their pain away. I'm such a good friend, my narcissistic side complimented.

"You okay, Belle?" I asked. "That's the second time you've freaked out like that when you see that guy."

"Yeah, I don't know, he just makes me feel some type of way. I can't really explain it," she tells me, not meeting my eyes. I sigh knowing that's as much as I'm going to get out of her.

"You don't have to tell me what's up, but I just wanna make sure you're actually okay and nothing is wrong," I try. I bite my lip nervously as I look for any of her tells. When she says or does nothing, I try again, "you know you can tell me if he's done anything right?"

At this, her eyes widen like two saucers and she instantly shuts me down, causing me to relax. That was one of the fears I held the most. "Lottie," she said grabbing my face with her hands, "I. Am. Okay."

Quickly, I wrapped my arms around her. I don't know what's wrong with me lately, being so emotional, not being able to cope. It's quite odd. I look up at her through blurry eyes, "I just love you so much, Belle, I just want everything to be okay!"

"Oh, no! Why are you crying?" She empathizes.

I laugh at her, throwing my hands up in the air, "I don't know!" A big smile falls on my face, making me feel content, "probably a full moon."

We chorus with a laugh, leaning on each other just sitting in comfortable silence.

Our silence was broken due to the sound of metal spatulas banging on a metal tray while making rolled ice. Belle turns to me, "rolled ice on me?"

"Oreo or blueberry?" I ask.

We both narrow our eyes at each other and chorus, "blueberry."

Today in psychology, we learned that through history, people have created fake realities to distort their real realities. It's called rationalization. Basically, it's a defense mechanism in which controversial behaviors, or feelings, are justified and explained in a seemingly rational or logical manner to avoid the true explanation, and are made more tolerable.

Our professor, Professor DeNicola, tied in our lesson with Halloween, being that today is the first of October, my favorite month of the year! She explained that Halloween originated to confuse the mythical creatures that, were believed, came into our world. People would dress up as demons and other creatures to blend in hoping that they wouldn't be caught. But what she didn't specify is whether or not it's true. Being the smart woman she is, Professor DeNicola said she'd leave it to us to figure out our own reality of the nature of Halloween.

When she dismissed us, Belle went straight to her car without stopping to say anything to me. Noticing her odd behavior, I ran after her and stood at her door when she slammed it.

I signaled for her to put her window down and when she did, I looked at her like she was crazy! "What's wrong, B?"

She rolled her eyes at me and scoffed, "don't act like you don't know! Don't pretend to be stupid, isn't that my job?"

My heart hurt at the idea that she thought I thought she was stupid. "No, I don't think you're stupid. What are you talking about!"

"I'm talking about in class. Professor DeNicola with her rationalization lesson and you just soaking it up and asking with your smart rationalized questions, right? 'Oh, Ms. DeNicola, believing in mystical creatures is completely irrational and childish, right?'" She mimicked me.

"I don't see the problem, Belle. I was asking a question on rationalization and the history behind Halloween! I wasn't asking to make you seem like you're stupid or anything, I didn't even mean it like that."

"Of course you meant it like that! I believe that there are such things as zombies and vampires and werewolves and mermaids and fairytale shit like that. Oh, but doesn't that make me stupid and irrational and childish?" Belle yelled. I only then realized what she meant.

I felt my face softened as the realization of the impact of my words. Belle thought that I thought she was stupid for thinking that Amelia was taken away by a mystical creature. I threatened to cry as I tried to explain to Belle what happened, "no, B. I was just intrigued by the lesson. I didn't even realize you were taking it that way. I didn't mean it like that, you're my best friend."

With anger and disgust, Belle yelled, "No, Charlotte Rae. I'm your only friend. Of course, you didn't realize you were hurting my feelings. That's why your nickname was fucking Lalaloopsy in high school because you're like a fucking airhead sometimes," She took a deep breath in, not caring about the tears that ran down my face, "don't come into my room when you get home. I don't wanna fucking see your face."

And just like that, she left.

I was left in the parking lot, standing there in shock. Not wanting anyone to see me cry, I quickly walked to my car and sat in there. The realization of Belle's words hit her. Belle was right about not having any other friends besides her. I had locked everyone out and only let in Belle and Amelia, but now that Amelia was gone, all she had left was Belle. But even then, I wasn't 100% sure I still had her.

Feeling the rage of hurting one of my best friends, I screamed in grief and banged my fist hard on her steering wheel. It seemed as if I hit too hard because my horn started blaring like crazy. I didn't care whether or not it blares, I'd eventually turn it off.

A knock on her window caused me to look up. My eyes met light hazel ones as the person told her to pull down her window. "Why the long face?" The guy asked.

I rolled my eyes and went to go put the window back up, but before I could do so, the guy told me to stop. "I'm sorry, I'm nosy. But pop your hood," he instructed. I stared at him with cautious eyes. "C'mon, I don't bite," he said.

I did as I was told and popped the hood of my car. The guy disappeared in front of my car and soon it stopped blaring. He slammed the hood and reappeared next to her door with a lopsided smile. "What'd you do?" I asked.

"All I did was pull out your honk wire. You're gonna have to get that fixed," he shrugged. I stared at him and something seemed familiar. It made me feel safe but shy.

"Thanks," I whispered. He shrugged again, not saying anything. I looked down at my hands and started my car. When I looked up back at my window to ask the guy for his name, he wasn't there. Looking around, I realized I was actually alone in the parking lot.

More like alone, in general, I sighed to myself. With that, I drove home, to where a ticking time bomb waited for me.

What a hell of a day.