The Defiance

“You do not know and do not understand what it took for me to get back… here. To get back to you”, I could feel the pain pouring out of his words. He had his hands on either side of my head while I helplessly leaning against the wall behind me for support.

My throat hurt so much from stopping all the emotions I had long bottled up. I was breathing so hard or was I not breathing at all?

I didn’t know at all.

He was clenching his jaw and gritting his teeth.

His eyes were glassy with tears but he refused to release them just like me. His whole body was tense with undercharged rage.

“You don’t know at all”, he bowed his head and I gulped on his accusation. I fisted my hands on my side keeping myself to say anything.

I wanted to shout.

I wanted to accuse him the same way he did.

But I did not want another word wasted on him. And it hurt like hell.

I’ve been through hell when he left and I was going through the same when he decided to come back taunting me with everything he is.

“It hurts. Like fucking shit…”, he whispered and I stayed silent staring at the wall in front of me.

“It fucking hurts…”, he said again a little louder this time.

“… and I love you so fucking much…”, and his lips were on mine.