CHAPTER 4: SCATTERED THOUGHTS

CHAPTER 4: SCATTERED THOUGHTS

(THIRD PARTY POV)

‘Damn! Damn!’

Rev wanted to punch himself as he walk towards the smoking lounge. He wanted to hit his head on the wall for being stupid. ‘I’m so stupid! Stupid!’, he thought to himself.

Why is he letting himself suffer? Why would he re-associate himself with the very person who ruined his dreams and plans in the past?

He closed his eyes tightly but he can still see that woman in his mind. She’s wearing that lovely wedding gown that enhanced the curves of her body, her delicate shoulders exposed; looking so deliciously enticing.

He closed his eyes even tighter. But the more he does that, the more he can see that woman, smiling the way she smiled that very first day they met- shy, tentative and unassuming.

Her hair is in that lovely braid, the same way it was braided that night a long time ago when she said that she loves him. And his heart skipped and beat furiously against its cage.

The mere thought of that night a long time ago made his blood boil. He felt cheated as if he was cheated just last night.

Rev reached for the cigarette inside his pocket and lit it.

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(REINA POV)

I looked for Rev and found him at the smoking lounge of the building. My nose crinkled at the smell of the cigarette he’s holding.

“You’re smoking,” I remarked, just in case he doesn’t realize what he’s doing. He simply shrugged his shoulders.

“I know, right.”

Grr! How can he just shrug it off like that?! He knows how much I despise cigarettes.

Rev was a smoker when I met him, and I started nagging him when we became friends, because I thought it wouldn’t do him any good and I really hated the smell. He decided to stop smoking just so I would stop nagging.

It seems he decided to go back to his old ways and now he’s acting as if he doesn’t care what I would think. Or maybe he has forgotten that I didn’t like it?

“Why are you smoking again?” I couldn’t stop myself from meddling.

“None of your business.”

“It’s my business, damnit!” Both of us were startled when I shouted. I looked away.

“You really should stop smoking,” I said after a while.

“Don’t intervene with my life. We have nothing to do with each other.”

“But I care about you, Rev!”

“Who gave you the right to meddle?”

“Who cares who gave me the right?! I said stop smoking already!”

I attempted to snatch the cigarette away but he was quick in evading my hands. I kept on trying to take it away, he kept on holding it away from me. He tried to push me, so I embraced him.

Rev froze on the spot when I hugged him tighter.

“Back off,” he said.

“No.”

“Get your hands off me.”

“I don’t wanna. Stop smoking first.”

“It’s gone now!” he showed cigarette butt. “Get off me now.”

“I don’t wanna. Let me hug you for a while,” I clung even tighter.

“Are you crazy??”

“I am.” ‘I am, Rev. Yes I’m crazy. I’m going insane. Just tell me not to marry, I will leave everything behind.’

After a few minutes of just standing there, hugging him, I let him go and went ahead to wait for his car. He followed me without any word. When the car came from the valet parking, I went in silently and secured my seatbelt.

“Why are you smoking again?” I asked him when he started driving. He rolled his eyes.

“I will not stop nagging you, you have to explain,” I insisted.

“I was just irritated, I needed to smoke to calm my mind,” he answered when he realized I wouldn’t stop pestering him.

“I’m not talking only about now.”

“I’m not smoking anymore.”

“Why do you have cigarettes with you, if you’re not?”

“It’s not mine. My friend hitched a ride this morning, he left it in my car. I just put it in my pocket because I intended to throw it away. Happy?”

“Is your lung a trashcan??”

“Ugh! You insist on being difficult, huh!”

“Because your alibi just sounds so stupid! Can you try thinking something more believable?”

“I am telling the truth! Whatever, I don’t care! Why am I even bothering to explain this to you??”

We both fell silent.

“Why were you irritated?” I changed the topic. But I think I shouldn’t have, because he looked murderous right now.

“Shut up.” And the curtains were drawn over his face once again.

I whispered my next question as if I didn’t want him to hear it.

“Did I remind you of her again? Of plan of marriage proposal that I ruined that night?”

He didn’t answer. And I didn’t really want to hear it. I just wanted to cry because his silence can only mean one thing. He still dreams of marrying Jean.

“What can I do to make it up to you?”

“Nothing.”

“Then maybe I should really just stay out of your sight. Don’t worry, once the wedding is through, you won’t hear from me anymore.”

He did not speak for a long time. I thought he wouldn’t talk to me again, so I was surprised when I heard his voice.

“Then, that would be great. Because there’s nothing that can make me happy right now than to be rid of you.”

Unable to control myself, I cried. I covered my face with my hands and bawled. ‘This is so hard.’