Act-7

I could see her body shaking with rage as she glared at me with a murderous intent. My eyes didn't leave her face. Even as she stomped towards me. Or when she pushed me down with a single shove. My eyes followed her, with every breath in me.

Not even, as she despicably looked down at my figure sprawled on the floor, with hands clutched into tiny fists at her side; ready to make impact with its victim.

I stared after her retreating figure when she turned away with a sprint.

I couldn't hear the screams of everyone around me. I couldn't take the hand of someone trying to pull me up.

I could only stare after the open door, through which she had left only but seconds ago. Yet, no one went after her.

And my eyes searched for her even when my legs broke into a sprint on its own.

I could faintly register the loud thumping of my heart in my ears. But my eyes remained glued to the road, until she came into my view.

My feet fell short and I tripped over myself when she half turned to look at me, with hair blowing on her face. My eyes didn't leave hers, until she turned her gaze straight ahead.

Not until she turned uphill and got cornered. It was the end of the cliff and she sharply turned to register my presence. My chest heaved from lack of oxygen, while her face showed dried tears and red, swollen, left cheek.

And yet, we didn't stop.

I didn't lose sight of her even as she tried to brush past me and I grabbed her with one hand and threw her to the ground.

Gasping for breath, my eyes remained glued to her sprawled figure but she made no attempt to get up. Her hair hid her face and I half expected her to get up and punch me. But she remained lifeless for what seemed like an eternity. And when she finally responded, it was a tiny sob. Followed by another and another, until she was brawling her face into the ground. I stood my ground disoriented, until my legs gave away and I fell butt flat to the ground.

I gawked at her figure, numb of all emotions. Yet, I didn't take my eyes off of her. Not even when she had wiped away her tears or when she had started walking down the hill and towards the Haveli; I was in step with her only a feet away, never letting her escape my sight.

That summer of 16 was my last time here, or so I had thought naively.

My gaze drifted from the road track from that day to her quiet figure sitting beside me. That's how it has always been with us. When we were not arguing, it was always quiet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I could never have thought that there would be a day that I would ever return to this Goddamned place.

That was my first thought as I grudgingly stepped foot outside the car. The 'Haveli' stood tall and majestic with all its grandeur as always. Some of the most initial painful memories of my life were linked with this cursed place. I had to pat my chest to be able to breathe again.

The sound of the car door shutting made me snap back to reality. I turned to the person behind the noise, distastefully. He noticed it and met my gaze but I looked away in revulsion and began walking towards the entrance.

'I can't believe, I have lived to return here.'

————————

I sat still in front of the mirror, clawing at the inside of my palm. Even though I heard him enter the room and walk closer, I didn't move an inch and kept my gaze fixated on the henna red hands, that covered my hands upto my elbows.

I had always loved henna, its colour and its scent. Always wearing it on Eid without missing a beat. Even though, I have been against marriage, I had since long decided that if I were to ever get married, then I would cover my hands and feet with henna.

And yet...I hate the mere sight of it right now.

He began with a sigh.

"The photographer is waiting...if you are ready..."

Silence.

I didn't respond. Just sat there, scratching off my henna, in attempts to make it disappear. In vain, obviously.

When he came to stand infront of me, I turned in my seat; away from him, without looking up. I could sense his anger, but I was in a far worse mood than him and if he didn't remember anything, that's on him. I was foolish to even forget about it for a second.

But now I remember and there is no way I am letting him off. Ever. I had decided that then, 12 years ago. To never forgive them.

Suddenly, I was yanked up from my chair. I didn't even realise when he had got to my side.

His face was inscrutable as he glared at me; holding me up by my arm. I was so pissed. I was so mad and that was the reason for the tears pooling in my eyes. That was all.

I opened my mouth to say anything but only my lips trembled and tears dripped down my cheeks. He clenched his jaw but didn't loosen his hold. His gaze lingering on my face for another second before he finally let me go. I watched him with every muscle tightening in my neck.

He was near the door when I threw a cushion at his back. Standing, with my hands clenched at my sides, awaiting his next move. He turned around and bent down to pick up the cushion lying at his feet before looking at me with that same infuriating passive gaze of his.

"NEVER! Never! dare to man-handle me again!! You hear me?!" I screamed through tears. My body shaking with suppressed rage.

He walked towards me with slow steps. My eyes widened at his move and I prepared myself for any physical assault. I didn't dare myself to blink, in case he would see me weak and vulnerable. But he stopped 4 feet from me and placed the cushion on the bed, before turning his gaze to me slowly. I raised my chin defiantly and immediately took my stance with clenched teeth, ready to take a blow.

"Sorry. It won't happen again. I apologise—for my behaviour." He spoke in a small voice but I didn't let down my guard, even when he was standing infront of the open door.

"Everyone is waiting. Please..." he left off mid-sentence and closed the door after him.

I watched the now closed door in shock and suddenly slumped down to the floor. Unable to muster anymore strength, I sat there crying my eyes out for another minute and took a few more minutes to retouch my makeup—although, my eyes were blood shot and nothing could conceal that.

——————-

I hated the photoshoot and more than that the curious and judgemental gazes of the photographers. Maybe even more than that, the fact that I had to pose 'lovingly' with my husband.

The Haveli was apparently a really good location for photoshoot.

'Wasn't pre-Barat photoshoot enough? It was awkward enough.' I wondered irritated.

We shot everywhere. From the huge drawing room to the ball room. Outside in the gardens and on the staircase. Everywhere, in short.

"Lovely! Come on now don't be shy miss Bride. Rayyan, you are supposed to be the one to take the lead. Stop being so stiff! Beautiful! Ethereal! Perfect!!" I wanted to kill that photographer but if I didn't smile through clenched teeth, he would just make us redo it like a million more times.

So, I took a deep breath and placed my hands on his shoulders, ignoring the shivers I got with every touch. He lightly placed his hands on my waist and I gulped unintentionally.

Why is this dress so tight? I can't breathe.

"Okay, now Zaira look up at Rayyan. Gaze at your hubby lovingly. Ah! Yes, perfect! Just a little smile will do it!" I looked at his face and realised he was pissed. His usual passive face was all tight and he wasn't looking at me but shooting death glares to the photographer. Suddenly he locked eyes with me on his command and I averted it on instinct. I couldn't stop feeling hot and embarrassed with every pose. His cologne and breath, the fact that he was a guy essentially and on top of that one whom I detest; basically, everything seemed to do weird things to me. Even worse, was when we were this close and I couldn't help but stare at his perfectly sculptured face. It wasn't this bad during the Barat photoshoot, though. Was it because it was so hectic at that time and I couldn't think about anything other than the fact, I would rather be gladly dead than doing this?

Unconsciously, I chewed on my lower lip and tightened my grip on him.

"Wow! That's a great pose. Yes—keep it there. Rayyan, come on be brave an give your wife a kiss. Aren't you foreign bred. That should be a piece of cake." Wait, what?!

I immediately looked up at him wide eyed. He looked away from the photographer to me. My eyes widening more, if that were even possible. He didn't seem opposed to the idea, instead his hold tightened on my waist.

"Rayy—" I couldn't say another word because he held me so close. In silent protest, I dug my nails on his shoulders but he didn't pay me any heed. My last resort was hoping it will go away if I closed my eyes or just waited— but for what? To get it over with and kill him later?

"Sorry—I think we are done." What? I opened my eyes when he backed away from me.

"Oh! No! No! I am sorry for being pushy. It wasn't my intention to offend— really." He became all frantic. Yet, I didn't feel bad for him in the least. I thought, whilst glaring at him through narrowed eyes.

"It's alright. Let's pack up" He stated it so calmly that I had to check myself from being jealous of him. Why didn't I stop all of this myself?

I was having these thoughts when he called out and brought me out of my daydream.

"Let's go?" He stared in anticipation to let him help me with the dress. Barely sparing him another glance, I went on to collect my lehnga ungracefully in bundles before starting to walk away from him, awkwardly.

Why the hell is he keeping in step with me now? Hate him! Hate this place!! When will I leave this haunting place?!

——————

Standing on stage and greeting the guests was harder than my expectations. As if that wasn't bad enough, Haniya had a arranged a couple dance for us.

I looked at the pink cake approaching towards us. It was a four tier, rose pink to match my dress, with Ruffle Rose details on the bottom and top tiers. I would have loved a chocolate fudge cake but I wouldn't have got to eat that either, so whatever.

I stood alongside him and realised that we have to cut it together. Obviously, Zaira.

Suddenly, the background music changed to ‘Jon Boden's-How long will I love you’.

'Oh, I love this song!' I thought and saw Haniya's face lit up in recognition . I nodded at her with my first real smile of the entire day and glanced up at him, who was holding out the knife for me to cut it with him. Gingerly, I placed my hand on top of his but he moved his hand over mine; so that he was clutching my hand.

I felt my heart skip a beat at his action but couldn't think any further as round of claps went around the ball room when he brought a small piece to my mouth.

His face held the expression, I can't do this anymore, and seeing that gave me some encouragement. Slowly opening my mouth, I let him feed me. When I did the same to him, he lightly grasped my hand and took a bite out of it.

Okay.

And then we were dragged on to the dance floor.

‘Can't this night be over already?’