Broken Howl

I burst through the doors and stumble out into the cold morning air. The world spins around me though my head is still throbbing from last night, but that pain is nothing compared to what claws at my chest now.

I am rejected by my mate. Mage who happens to be Alpha Valen Nightclaw.

My luck can not be this bad.

And my heart. It feels like it’s being ripped apart, piece by piece. Each breath is sharp, like glass cutting through my lungs. The bond—our bond—it’s still there, but barely. A fragile thread hanging by a shred of hope that was crushed before it even had a chance to grow.

I can’t breathe.

His words echo in my mind, relentless, stabbing at me with every step I take. I reject you. He is so cruel. How can he do this?

I squeeze my eyes shut, as if that could erase the sound of it, but it’s burned into my soul now. His rejection isn’t just a wound—it’s a scar that will never heal.

My wolf stirs inside me, restless, furious. She’s howling, desperate to escape, to run, to get away from the suffocating pain that threatens to drown us both.

I can’t fight her anymore.

I break into a run, my feet pounding against the ground, my breath coming in ragged gasps. I barely make it past the treeline before I let go. My body shifts, bones snapping and reshaping, the familiar rush of transformation taking over.

And then I’m free.

I hit the ground on four paws, my wolf taking control. She howls a raw, broken sound that shatters the silence of the forest. The pain is too much to keep inside. It pours out of me in that howl, in every heavy beat of my heart, in every tear I refuse to shed.

I run, faster and faster, trying to outrun the agony that wraps itself around my chest like a vice. But no matter how far or how fast I go, it’s still there. His rejection is a weight I can’t shake, dragging me down with every step.

I hate him.

The thought claws its way through my mind, bitter and sharp. How could he? How could he reject me so easily, without a second thought? My mate. My *Alpha*. He didn’t even hesitate. One moment of recognition, and then nothing. Like I meant nothing.

My wolf snarls, furious, and I push harder, my paws digging into the earth as I run faster. The wind whips through my fur, cold and biting, but it’s nothing compared to the coldness he left inside me.

I hate him.

But it’s not just hate. It’s pain. Pain so deep it cuts me to the bone. Every beat of my heart feels like a betrayal like it’s mocking me for still beating, for still caring, when he... when he’s already moved on.

My wolf growls, but there’s an ache underneath it, a sorrow so raw that it drowns out everything else. The pull of the mate bond still lingers, faint but real, reminding me of what I’ve lost. Of what he threw away.

The moon is high in the sky, shining down on me like it’s watching, bearing witness to my suffering. They say the moon sees all, but I wonder now if it even cares.

If fate is so cruel, why should I trust it?

My paws slow, the rage burning out as exhaustion takes over. I stumble to a halt, chest heaving, legs shaking beneath me. The forest is quiet now, only the sound of my ragged breaths breaking the silence. I collapse onto the ground, the cold earth beneath me a sharp reminder of how empty I feel inside.

I curl into myself, trying to block out the pain, but it’s no use. It’s there, gnawing at me, tearing me apart from the inside.

Why?

Why would the Moon Goddess give me a mate only to let him rip me apart like this? Why would she curse me with a bond so strong, only to let him reject me without a second thought? What did I do to deserve this?

My wolf whimpers, her anger fading into sorrow. She doesn’t understand either. We were supposed to be strong together. But now, we’re broken.

The silence presses down on me, suffocating in its emptiness. I try to block it all out, to push the pain away, but it’s useless. It’s like a shadow, clinging to me no matter where I go.

I close my eyes, letting the darkness take over, if only for a little while. But even then, in the quiet of the forest, all I can hear are his words.

I reject you.

And my heart breaks all over again.

My legs feel like lead as I finally slow, the burning in my chest dulling into a steady throb. The forest around me is quiet, nothing but the whisper of the wind through the trees. My paws drag through the dirt, heavy with exhaustion, but it’s not enough to numb the pain inside me. I can still hear his voice, that cold, emotionless rejection echoing in my mind.

I grit my teeth, pushing the thought away, but it claws its way back, relentlessly. My wolf is tired, her energy drained from the run, but the ache in her chest is still there, gnawing at her, at us. We can’t escape it.

Eventually, I reach the edge of the forest, my breath coming in short gasps. My house comes into view, the familiar sight of the small wooden cabin nestled between the trees. The place I grew up. The place where I was supposed to be safe.

It doesn’t feel like home anymore.

I pause just beyond the treeline, panting as my body shakes from the exertion. The moonlight filters through the branches, casting silver shadows over me. My wolf whines softly, torn between the urge to run further and the need to return to something familiar. But there’s nowhere else to go. Nowhere to hide from the pain.

With a shudder, I let the shift take me. My bones crack and rearrange, fur receding as my body reshapes itself. The transformation is quick, but not painless. Not this time. It feels like the rejection is woven into my very being, pulling at my skin, twisting in my bones.

As soon as I was back on two legs, the cold hit me. The morning air bites at my bare skin sending a chill straight through me. It’s too quiet out here, too still. The world feels wrong, out of place, just like me. Like I no longer belong in it.

I hug my arms to my chest, teeth chattering, and glance around. My mother’s laundry is hanging on the line, swaying gently in the breeze. The smell of clean fabric mixes with the scent of the woods, a small reminder of normalcy in this whirlwind of chaos.

I walk over, my steps slow and deliberate, my limbs heavy with exhaustion. My fingers brush against the soft cotton of one of my mother’s shirts, and for a moment, I close my eyes, inhaling the familiar scent. It’s comforting, in a way—like holding onto a piece of something that hasn’t been tainted by rejection and betrayal.

I pull the shirt down from the line and slip it over my head. It’s too big for me, hanging loosely around my frame, but the fabric is warm against my cold skin. The simple act of putting it on feels like a small victory, a piece of control in a world that’s spiralling out of it.

I stand there for a moment, staring up at the sky. The same sky that binds us, that governs our lives as wolves. The same sky that watches over him.

Valen.

My throat tightens at the thought of him, my hands balling into fists at my sides. The pull of the mate bond is still there, a constant, painful reminder of what I’ve lost—of what was never mine to begin with. I hate him. I hate him for rejecting me, for leaving me to feel this way. But underneath that hate, there’s something worse.

I still want him.

My wolf stirs again, restless and confused, caught between love and hate, desire and anguish. She wants to run back to him, to demand an explanation, to force him to feel what I feel. But what’s the point? He made his choice.

He doesn’t want me.

I bite down on my lip, hard enough to taste blood. The sharp pain is a welcome distraction, if only for a moment. But no matter how much I try to push it away, the reality of it all sinks deeper into my bones. He rejected me. His words were final. Cold.

I take a shaky breath, my fingers gripping the hem of the shirt. There’s no going back now. I can’t undo what’s been done. All I can do is try to survive this, one breath at a time.

But it feels like I’m drowning.

I glance back toward the house, its windows dark and silent. The only sound is the rustle of the wind through the trees, the only witness to my heartbreak. I take a step forward, then another, my legs moving mechanically as if they’re the only part of me that hasn’t given up.

The moon watches me. Silent. Unforgiving.

And I keep walking because that’s all I can do.