CHAPTER ELEVEN: in which her motive is clear- VEGAS

Present day

VEGAS

After we made a few vague plans on how to ‘wrangle’ an invitation, I left Shondra foraging in the fridge.

Crossing the marbled foyer, I headed upstairs, running my hand up the intricately carved wooden banister. When Shondra had this house built, she worked with a top architect and designer to bring the home life. She wanted light and air, and a showcase for her wealth. 

And they delivered. Ten fold.

Original art from several African and African-American artists hung on the walls. Modern furniture (costly and comfy) graced every room. Each window, most floor to ceiling, let in as much light as possible. Before I moved in, the house and grounds featured in several magazines and talk shows. Shondra had declined further offers, even one she’d received from People Magazine, out of respect for my privacy.

Not for the first time had she put my needs before hers. And as much as I didn’t want her to, she would continue to do so. Shondra rarely budged, and she usually got her way. Like when I told her of my plans. The words of “I’m thinking about moving back to Chicago” were no sooner out of my mouth when Shondra took over. She helped me get my last two years of residency switched to a hospital she donated to and insisted I live with her—rent, utility, and food cost, free.

My best friend. My sister.

On the last riser, my gratitude for Shondra, something I felt every day, welled inside me. I stood in awe at how perfect my life was in these moments. With a heart filled with love, I rounded the corner and opened the door.

And inside ... a miracle.

Kae was fast asleep on her back in her wooden crib. A chubby hand pressed against her head. The nanny had dressed her in one of her many, many sets of pink pajamas.

Shrondra had insisted on a pink. “I’m going to give my goddaughter everything I wanted, but my mama couldn’t afford,” she’d told me.

I tried to argue with her, but she shot me down so much, my behind leaked lead.

In the end, Shondra had her way and pink held sway.

Kae had a room fit for a princess. Baby-doll pink paint graduated from the floor to the ceiling, ending in a whitish-blush. A quilted patterned rug, pink of course, spanned almost the entire width of the dark bamboo floor. All her stuffed animals were pink, her strollers—pink, and most of her clothes were pink. Pink was my baby’s color. It went well with her olive tinted complexion and dark curls.

My arms ached to hold her soft, warm weight. I settled instead for brushing my fingers through her mop of thick hair. Her pink bow lips pursed and my heart nearly burst through my chest when she laughed in her sleep. Her timbre was as light as air and sweeter than Dutch apple pie.

Jae is half Dutch.

That made my baby a quarter. When I first found out I was pregnant, three weeks to the day after Jae and I were together, Shondra hired a top investigation firm to find him. By then I was ready to search all of Chicago, I missed him so much. We had more than sex that night, we connected, like two old souls separated by time and space. Even during, I knew it was more than just physical. I must’ve cursed myself a thousand times for running out on him because I was too damn scared to give him a chance. Even if I was ninety-nine percent sure we’d end up like my first and only relationship, Jae deserved a chance to prove me wrong.

Trouble was, the firm dug up a lot on Mr. Jameson Thijssen.

It was true his net worth was more than I, as a doctor, would probably ever see in my lifetime. It was true he’d started divorce proceedings, but he hadn’t gotten divorced.

Learning that minor detail had caused such a pain to blossom over my heart, I feel to my knees, right there in the detective’s office. The detective, a balding man with wisps of white hair and jowls like a hound dog, had gazed at me with sympathy while Shondra patted my back.

Amidst their sounds of compassion, a steely resolve overtook me. I mentally put on my big girl panties and pulled back my shoulders like the woman I was. “No matter his marital state,” I said, switching my gaze between the blinking detective and commiserating Shondra, “Jae deserves to know about his child.”

The detective offered to set up a meeting. Shondra did as well. I declined. My problem wasn’t theirs.

I came up with a plan and put it into place. I put off my residency by a year and carved out a bit of time here and there to stalk Jay. With my binoculars around my neck, I parked in the first row of the upscale strip mall outside of Jae’s apartment. It took almost six months before he exited the front doors at the same time I was there.

My heart jumped when he came into view, only to crash when I saw who was on his arm. An unpleasant taste, like cold popcorn, filled my mouth. My baby moved within me, kicking in protest at the sight.

Jae’s wife chatted like a magpie while he smiled down at her. Another couple walked with them and from the expression on their faces, they admired the lovebirds. That was bad enough, but what really broke me was his wife’s diamond ring. I caught the flash through my binoculars. With the magnification of the lens, the rock looked as big as a robin’s egg.

Morning sickness, something I didn’t suffer from until then, started that day. That moment. My Starbucks latte and chocolate chip cookie had splashed my lap and the floorboard while something inside me broke. That something was my belief in happily ever after and love at first sight. After two strikes, first Terence and then Jae, I promised never again to put so much faith in a man. Once Kae was born two-and-a-half months later, I left Chicago and ran to Dallas.

I was content to stay there and would have if Terence hadn’t called me, begging for another chance. I was ashamed to tell Shondra it took only a week for him to convince me when she had been trying every day for the past two years. Truth was, it was neither of them. I missed Chicago and the people I’d left there. Chicago was my home.

The people in charge of the residence program didn’t give me static. I told them my father, who’d finally divorced the bitch of his wife, needed help to get into a nursing home. The doctors had diagnosed him with the beginning stages of Alzheimer’s. His wife had stayed true to form by honoring her marriage vows and sticking by him through thick and thin—note the sarcasm. When I found Daddy, Tina had taken his money, his baseball memorabilia, and his dignity by moving him into a junkie-infested building in the worst part of Chicago.

I settled him into one of the best facilities in Chicago and with a trusted nanny to watch my child, a fiancé, and a residency program arranged by Shondra, I lacked for nothing. 

Except for Jae. He was in town. Somewhere. Maybe the same place? All I had to do was stalk him like I did before. No one had to know. No one had to discover the longing I still harbored in my heart...

But I pushed those thoughts down. Way down. So far, they didn’t resurface... until I saw him again.

Terence was to be the answer to my prayers. I wanted a stable life with someone who had a stellar background, and Terence was it. There were no skeletons in his closet. I had Shondra make sure.

Yes, Terence was perfect. And no matter how often I needed to say it to convince myself, Terence was the man I loved.

But when did convincing ever guarantee believing?