My unique queen

01

Two characters.

Two voices.

Two pasts di - As usual please. I sat down at my usual table at Le Renouveau, a small, not very popular bar-cafe on Main Street, close to my high school. The barman put a cappuccino in front of me and I took out a book. I very rarely eat lunch.

I prefer to stay here and read, alone in this quiet place, until it's time to go back to class. I take the bus to the school, and as the journey takes several minutes, I prefer to stay near the school than to go home.

My mother works and can't pick me up. So I've been doing this for two years, since I started high school. I'm seventeen years old and I've just entered my final year. I like solitude, that's why I always come here alone, without my friends. In fact, I don't really have any friends, neither in my school nor outside. I don't think I've ever needed anyone to help me move on, or just to help me.

It's always been my choice, to get away from everyone. I have a pretty heavy past and I've learned to move on alone for a while. I know that if I get too attached to someone, they will want to get closer to me and find out more about my life. The only people who know are my family members. But they only know the story, not my feelings.

My feelings are a very secret thing, and I have never told anyone about them. I walked over to the barista to order another cappuccino and felt a look on my face. The same guy as usual was sitting at the bar with a coffee and looking at me. I see him here a lot.

Sometimes he's alone, sometimes not. Today, no one was keeping him company. I often noticed him looking at me. For a long time. He was really handsome and must have been about twenty years old. Even from a distance I could see his beautiful, very light eyes staring at me with remarkable intensity. I had no idea why he seemed interested in me. I had nothing that would interest anyone.

I was a rather plain and simple looking girl. I didn't wear extravagant clothes, just simple jeans and unmarked T-shirts, and I didn't wear make-up. I was quite thin, quite tall and had long brown hair. Everything was done so that no one would notice me and that I could go unnoticed. But it didn't seem to work with him for several days.

Since the beginning of the school year a fortnight ago to be precise. Maybe he just thought I was weird, which is probably the most likely possibility. I had resumed my occupation when I felt a presence near me.

- Can I sit down? So his eyes were blue. A blue so clear and so deep that it disturbed me greatly. His gaze, so vivid and so mysterious, stopped me in my tracks for a moment.

Un instant très court qu'il a sans doute remarqué puisqu'un sourire amusé et sublime s'est dessiné sur son visage. Comme je ne répondais pas, il a tiré la chaise et s'est installé, sans mon autorisation. - Comment tu t'appelles ? Je me suis contentée de reprendre ma lecture en éludant volontairement sa question.

- Je ne vais pas te manger, tu sais ? Je levai de nouveau les yeux de mon livre et le regardai en essayant de comprendre ce qu'il voulait et pourquoi il me parlait. Il me souriait seulement, en remuant son café, et attendait probablement ma réponse. Je fais exprès de m'installer à cette table, la plus reculée et la plus isolée de l'entrée, pour ne pas avoir affaire avec ce genre de situation. Jusqu'à maintenant, tout avait fonctionné comme je le voulais.

- Tu ne veux pas me répondre ? - Belle déduction... marmonnai

-je, plus pour moi-même que pour lui répondre. Je me maudissais déjà de lui avoir répondu. - Donc finalement tu parles, rit-il. - On dirait. Tu veux quelque chose ? lui demandai-je assez froidement.

- Savoir comment tu t'appelles. Entre autres, me sourit-il. Entre autres ? Je ne pense pas qu'il m'observe depuis plusieurs jours seulement pour savoir mon nom. Et j'avais comme l'impression qu'il n'allait pas me lâcher tant que je ne lui répondrais pas.

- Jessica.

- Moi c'est Flo. Enchanté. Il s'était présenté sans que je ne lui ai demandé et je n'en avais pas eu l'intention d'ailleurs. Je bus une gorgée de ma boisson en lui jetant un rapide coup d'œil pour ne pas qu'il pense que je lui prête trop d'attention. Un large sourire s'affichait sur son visage fin et vraiment très joli. Ses cheveux bruns très foncés partaient dans tout les sens et une barbe de deux ou trois jours parsemait le bas de ses joues et son menton.

Finalement, mon coup d'œil n'était pas si rapide que ça... Et je crois qu'il l'a remarqué. Il me déstabilise et je n'aime pas ça. Je n'ai pas l'habitude d'être perturbée pour si peu, mais il était vraiment très intriguant et son regard m'attire. Il faut que je fasse attention à ne pas trop baisser ma garde.

- Autre chose ? lui demandai-je calmement. - Ça te dirait de faire connaissance ?

- Non merci. - Plutôt directe comme réponse ! s'exclama-t-il en riant.

Comme je ne répondais pas, il ajouta :

- J'ai remarqué que tu étais toujours à la même table tout les midis. Il ne lâchera donc pas l'affaire... Bon, pourquoi je ne discuterais pas un peu pour une fois. - Et tu as remarqué autre chose ?

- Hormis que tu lis toujours un livre en buvant un cappuccino, tout les jours, sauf le jeudi, non rien d'autre, me répondit-il d'un ton naturel. - Et tu m'observes comme ça depuis quand ? lui demandai-je calmement même si au fond de moi j'étais étonné par ce qu'il venait de dire.

- Je pense que tu le sais déjà non ? me sourit-il avec arrogance. Et je ne t'observe pas, je te regarde. - Ça change tout alors ! dis-je ironiquement. Ma remarque le fit rire de nouveau, et son sourire est resté pendu à ses lèvres.

- Tu ne viens pas ici depuis très longtemps, non ? Je ne te vois que depuis le début du mois et ça fait longtemps que je viens là. Je me levai, rangeai mon livre dans mon sac, et commençai à partir sans répondre à sa question.

- Tu t'en vas ? - Oui.

- À demain alors ! dit-il en souriant.

- No. Why? - Why not?

- It's Thursday tomorrow. - Oh yeah, shit..." I heard him grunt as I walked past him. I walked out of the café, my bag on my back and zipped up my jacket. - Jessica, wait! He's not going to let me go... I continued walking towards the school without stopping.

- I continued walking towards the school without stopping. "What? - Will we see each other again?" he asked as I reached him. - Probably. - Will we? He seemed surprised by my answer, probably expecting a refusal from me. - You drink your coffee in the same place as me, so we might run into each other again, yes. Don't you have anything else to do at the moment?

-I asked him, walking along, with him still at my side. - Yes, I do. He gently grabbed my arm, still smiling, to make me stop. - Will you be back on Friday? I disengaged myself to continue my journey.

- How much longer are you going to follow me? Because you'll have to stop after a while. - If you say we'll meet again on Friday, then I'll turn around," he smiled.

- I could very well say yes without thinking it...

- You don't look like a liar.

- You don't know me!" I said coldly. - I would like to. Until Friday then? He had stopped in front of me to look at me and prevent me from moving on. - Yes," I whispered. I walked around him and heard a "thank you" as I passed him. But what am I getting into?

This girl intrigues me. I've seen her in the café with the guys several times, but they haven't noticed her. At the same time, I think she does everything to avoid being noticed: she doesn't talk, doesn't make any noise and is always alone, in the same place. She comes in, drinks her cappuccino - or cappuccinos - while reading, and leaves without asking for anything else.

Every day she had the same sad, melancholic look on her sweet face. When she looked at me, I could see nothing in her blue eyes. Not a hint of joy, nor of sadness, nor even of anger when I spoke to her.

So I didn't know if my presence really bothered her or not, even if her scathing retorts answered me by themselves... Yet I had seen the few quick glances she gave me from time to time. She probably thought I hadn't noticed but she was wrong.

When I met her beautiful eyes, she instantly looked away, as if she was afraid of being surprised, as if she was doing something wrong, while I only wanted to look into her fascinating eyes a little longer.

Why her? I don't know. But I went to talk to her, after a long reflection with myself. I had wanted to for several days, but each time, either she wasn't there, or the guys were with me, or I had hesitated too long and she had left the café.

It was not my habit to hesitate for so long before approaching a girl. And then, normally, they come to me, we talk, I take them home, and they leave the next day. I'm twenty-one years old, and I like to have fun, which is quite normal, isn't it?

But she was different: simple, shy and not at all self-centred, not narcissistic, not pretentious, and certainly not a tease. At least, I had the impression that she was, from what she had let me see. I hadn't had time to talk to her much.

She was rather reserved and in a hurry to go somewhere. I would have followed her to see where she was going but that would have been a bit perverse and psychopathic at the same time. And besides, I didn't have time. I had to go back to work.

I went back after finishing my coffee. As I was a big slacker in high school and I hadn't passed my baccalaureate, my uncle had asked me to work with him. I didn't really want to at first but in the end I did well. I really liked what I was doing.

- Well then, man! You're late, what the hell were you doing?

- Sorry, I didn't realize what time it was, I was at the café," I replied to Thibault, one of my colleagues and also my best friend.

Even to him, to whom I usually tell everything about the girls I like, I didn't mention this pretty young woman who intrigued me. I didn't because I knew that he would send me to her, that she would probably get scared and run away. Plus, he probably would have made fun of me because I didn't dare.

- I can see that! Anyway, Melanie's having a party this weekend, can you pick me up?

Thibault doesn't have a car anymore, so I've been his personal driver for the last two weeks. It would be nice if he thought about having it repaired at some point !