Chapter 1: Introduction

Like any other human being, I fall and get hurt. The only problem with me is I fall and get hurt over and over again. I feel like I’m the unluckiest person in this world.

“I’m sorry, Sairyl.”

Those were the words he said when he broke up with me.

“You’re sorry? What can your ‘sorry’ do? Do you think it’s some kind of magic band-aid to ease the pain you’re giving me now?” I slapped him so hard my hand even hurt from it. I immediately turned my back on him and walked away with confidence. I am not going to cry. I have to keep my pride, this is the only thing I have left.

...but as I walked away, my clumsy self, as always, made me slip on the wet floor and I dived right into the mud.

“Sai, are you ok?” My stupid ex ran to me looking so worried. If I know, he’s probably just trying to suppress his laughter! I’m even wearing a white uniform, what a way to look so pathetic in front of my now ex-boyfriend.

“I’m ok!” I tried to stand up on my own and didn’t bother to reach out his hands.

“Sai, I think your knee is bleeding. Are you sure you’re ok?”

Of course, I am not ok. I feel like crying. It hurts so bad physically and emotionally.

“Look, you are not my boyfriend anymore. We just broke up so you’re not responsible for me! Stop acting as if you care! Get lost! I don’t want to see you ever again!”

He looked hurt, but why?

“I’m really sorry, Sai. Ok, I’ll do as you say. I’ll stay away and won’t bother you anymore. But please do me a favor, take care of yourself especially that I’m not there to look for you anymore.”

After saying that, he left. I turned my back as well and walked away farther from him. I did not dare to look back and desperately call him.

I hate that he left me knowing that he was the only person who’s always there to catch me whenever I fall — whenever I hurt myself. I guess I need to start learning to stand on my own feet now. I’m all on my own, I can only rely on myself.

“Sairyl! Sairyl De Mesa!”

“What? Can you please stop shouting? I’m not deaf.”

Kyla, my best friend, smiled apologetically at me. She’s a bit hyper and always full of energy which annoys me from time to time as I’m more of an introverted person.

“Sorry, Sai! I just missed you!” this tiny girl jumped on me and hugged me so tight. Kyla is a very sweet and clingy person. We’re almost the opposite in terms of personality so I am not so sure how we clicked in the first place.

“Sai, you look prettier today!”

I gave her a suspicious glance, “You sound like you need something from me. You just don’t compliment me like that out of the blue. Spit it out.”

She giggled at me while she tucked her long curly hair behind her ear, “Well… I have a dinner date today.”

“...so you want me to cover you up with your parents and tell them you’re with me?”

Kyla’s parents are a bit strict in terms of her dating other guys while she’s still not finished with her studies.

She nodded, “That’s part of it…”

“What? There’s more to your request?”

She nodded again and smiled shyly, “You see…”

She played with her fingers seeming to try to find the right words to say, “That’s going to be my first dinner date as you probably know already. I don’t really know what to do there so maybe, you can join us? Sort of a double date?”

One of my eyebrows raised and I said sarcastically, “Do you want me to bring my dog as a date? Did you forget that I am single? I don’t have a boyfriend to bring to that double date of yours. Just do it yourself, you are an adult already, you can figure it out on your own.”

“But I can help you find a date! Please, Sai? I’m really having cold feet going to this date alone!” She insisted and did not stop pestering me the whole day until I finally gave in and accepted her offer to look for a date for me so I could join her.

We got into a noisy pub where there were billiard tables and the place mostly had boys in it. It kind of reeks of alcohol and cigarette smoke as expected from a pub.

“Can you explain, Ms. Kyla, what are we doing in a place like this?”

“What else? I’m going to introduce you to your date tonight!” She pulled me towards a bar table where there were boys seated there and laughing while having a drink.

“Hi, guys!” Kyla greeted the 3 guys at the bar table, they looked either the same age as us or probably 1 or 2 years older than us. I’m not so sure.

“Hey, Kyla! What’s up?”

“You know them?” I whispered to Kyla.

“Yup, they are my cousin’s friends!”

“Hey, couz, you’re here!” I was startled when someone from behind us shouted and approached Kyla while putting his arms around her shoulder.

“There you are, my favorite cousin! Great timing! I’m going to introduce you to my beautiful best friend, Sairyl!” She pulled my hand to show me and get closer to the guy next to her. I was taken aback and didn’t know what to say, “And Sairyl, this is my handsome cousin, Brian!”

I just stared at him, not knowing what to say or to do. I wasn’t really prepared for this.

The guy called Brian smiled at me and stretched his hands towards me like asking for a handshake, “Hi Sairyl, it’s nice meeting you.”

I tried to reach his hands to shake it too, “Nice meet—what the fuck?”

I couldn’t help myself but curse loudly when my peripheral vision caught someone very familiar to me — Cedric, my ex-boyfriend.

“Hey guys, sorry I’m late. Got stuck in traffic. What’s up?” As soon as he asked that to his friends, he looked in my direction and he froze.

It’s been almost a year since I last saw him and I thought I was just imagining it, but I pinched my hand and looked in his direction again. No, I am not imagining this. I am really seeing my ex-boyfriend in front of me right now.

I want to leave this place immediately or else, I might end up crying and look pathetic again in front of him.