#9

Michael.

"Mom please stop forcing me into something I cannot survive in" I said this thing to my mother like for I do not know how many times she is just not understanding any of this at all and was telling me how all of this was right.

"I'm sure that this girl is very much for you, I don't know what's the matter with you, you are doing all this because she left you mid-way, now who is suffering you or her" my mom yelled.

' I don't think anyone is suffering here's My inner self stated.  Wait what why?!!!! Why would I even think that way. I’m suffering I’m feeling bad. But, why do I feel calm within like all this was something that the inner me wanted to happen, the inner me? where did all this come from, I pushed that thought behind and walked towards mom.

"I need you the most now" I said while looking at her.

"I'm doing exactly that Mickey, I'm here for you like always and forever" mom said.

I just walked to her and hugged her; I don't know what all this was I never have had ever argued with her before. Because I knew somewhere that she was right, she was right about everything all my life I have seen her take some drastic steps to make things better to best. But the wedding is just something I cannot convince myself to do right now.

"You have to do this; take all the time you want and then accept it but make sure she is around as she will make you feel comfortable soon" she said while rubbing my back.

I don't know what was going on and how to handle all this. She is asking me to do this and give it some time like how would that even work out I had known Olivia for so long now and she has left me at this stage and she is asking me to give no time for this wedding and to understand all this I need to give it time post weeding. None of this makes sense to me.

"She is perfect for you. understand this, listen to me for once and I'm sure you will definitely love the way it will be carried forward." 

I will love, I would destroy so much that cannot be even fixed.

"I'll do it, for you" I said and was ready for this step.

I know it was wrong and it had two people involved in it. I could end up ruining her life and she would also do the same. But what gives me chills is that somewhere deep down I feel that I should go ahead with this and take this.... more like welcome this in life.

I will just have to marry her that is what my mother wants to let me do this for her for my mom eventually I can show her how bad this decision was and can end this relationship any time I wanted to.

Sarah might be married to me, but she will never be known as my WIFE.