5

Kelly sat cross-legged on her bed, staring into

empty space. She couldn’t stay here. She’d been

stupid to think that she could exist in an environment

where she was exposed to Jarrod.

It had been all she could do to keep it together.

She was furious that she’d sat there while that

bastard stood in the doorway with his bewildered

look of innocence, but she’d been paralyzed the

moment he’d walked into Ryan’s apartment.

She hated the feeling of helplessness and she’d

never, never allow herself to be such a passive

respondent again. Going forward, if she saw the

bastard, she’d kick his ass, pregnant or not. And

then she’d tell Ryan precisely what he could do with

his precious brother.

She hated Jarrod with a passion she reserved for

few things in her life. And she hated Ryan for turning

his back on her when she absolutely needed him the

most.

No, she couldn’t stay here. Not a minute longer.

She forced herself to consider her alternatives.

This time she wasn’t fleeing on ragged impulse

without caring which way the wind blew her. No, she

would come up with a solid plan of action. She’d go

someplace quiet and safe—a good place to raise

her son or daughter.

“You’re leaving, aren’t you?”

Ryan’s voice came from the door. She started

guiltily and finally raised her eyes to his. Angry

because she allowed herself to feel guilt even for a

second, she hardened her gaze as she stared back

at him.

“There’s no reason for me to stay.”

“Come with me into the living room,” he said,

holding his hand out to her. For a long moment she

simply stared at his outstretched hand. She should

refuse, but something in his voice made her comply

and she slipped her hand into his much larger one.

He pulled her up from the bed and led her into the

living room.

Sitting on the couch, he pulled her down beside

him. He ran an agitated hand through his hair. “I’ve

been an ass and I’m sorry. You’re in no condition to

bear this stress and pressure and I’ve only added to

your burden.”

She opened her mouth to speak and he placed a

finger over her lips. “Let me finish. I’ve been in the

office all morning and I’ve got some problems

arising with an extremely important project that my

partners are unable to attend to. Problems that

require my immediate attention and presence. Iwant

you to come with me.”

She stared blankly at him. Why? She didn’t get it.

Why torture themselves? Why was he so persistent

in flogging the dead horse that was their

relationship? He’d been the one to end it. He had

rendered judgment and tossed her aside like she’d

never meant anything to him.

She opened her mouth to ask him just that, but

again, he silenced her with his finger.

“Let me take care of you, Kelly. Let’s forget for the

time being all the problems in the past and just

concentrate on the present.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“I’m very serious. I’ve never been more serious in

my life. We have a lot to work out. We can’t do that if

we aren’t willing to spend the time together and talk.”

She’d never wanted to break down and cry more

in her entire life. If only he’d been willing to listen

before. If only he’d been willing to talk, to understand

then. The one person she should have been able to

count on above all others had coldly looked through

her and called her a liar. And now he wanted to kiss

and make up?

He touched her face with his fingers, and she was

surprised that they trembled against her skin. His

eyes were imploring her and she wavered on the

edge of indecision. God, was she actually

contemplating this farce? Even as she posed the

question to herself she was shaking her head in

automatic refusal.

He stopped the negative sway of her head by

cupping her cheek and stroking his thumb lightly over

her lips.

“No pressure, no promises, no obligations. Just

you and me and a restful week on the beach. It’s a

start. It’s all I’m asking for. I’ll only ask for what you’re

willing to give.”

“But the baby—”

“Iwould never do anything to endanger the baby,”

he said quietly. “Or you. You’ll have to see the doctor

here and get his okay to travel. It’s the only way I

gyyywould consider taking you on this trip.”

Her eyes dropped to her hands knotted in her lap.

It was tempting, so very tempting. He was asking,

not demanding, and for a moment she was

transported back to their time together—to the

wonderfully tender and caring Ryan she had been

engaged to. Could she leave him again after

spending a week with him? Because she had no

future with a man who could so coldly discard their

relationship over the word of another.

The silence stretched out between them as she

grappled with the decision. Yes, she would do it. Shewasn’t sure why. Nothing could come of it, but she

wanted this time with him before she left to get on

with her life. She nodded her assent and relief was

stark in Ryan’s eyes. It was so easy to pretend he

cared when he put on such a good act. But clearly hedidn’t. If he had, they would still be together, married,

awaiting the birth of their first child.

“We have to get you to the doctor this afternoon

for a checkup. If he gives the thumbs-up we’ll fly out

tomorrow, so it’s important you get plenty of rest

today and tonight. Once we get there, the most

strenuous thing you’ll have to do is walk from the

hotel room to the beach.”

“Iwant separate rooms,” she said.

“I’ve reserved us a suite.”

She frowned but didn’t argue.

“You won’t regret this, Kell,” he said, reverting to

his pet name for her. She had the strangest urge to

weep. How had they gotten so far away from the

plans they had made just months earlier?

“We can do this. We can work it out.”

She closed her eyes. The thing was, it was easy

to be seduced by the intensity in those words. But

going forward would be impossible until they’d

addressed their past. And she never ever wanted to

go back to that horrible day when her world had

been so brutally upended.

The doctor was very approving of a week of rest

and relaxation for Kelly and cautioned her to seek

medical attention if the swelling got worse or she

developed other symptoms.

Ryan had hung on to every word the doctor said

and had acted just like a concerned husband and

father. Instead of making her feel good, it depressed

the hell out of her because it drew attention to the

fact that their situation was hopeless.

When they arrived back at the apartment there

were several department store bags stacked just

inside the door. She eyed them curiously because

they were decidedly feminine-looking, and if she

wasn’t mistaken, there was even a bag from a wellknown lingerie store.

She glanced at Ryan, one eyebrow arched in

question.

“Oh good, Jansen’s been by,” Ryan said as he

walked over to the assortment of bags. “They’re for

you. For our trip.” He gathered the handles and

brought everything over to the couch, gesturing for

her to have a look.

A little befuddled, she opened the packages,

finding several maternity sundresses and sleek

designer outfits, as well as beach attire all the way to

a pair of sandals. As suspected, there were even all

the girlie accoutrements in the lingerie bag.

“You shouldn’t have done this,” she murmured.

How quickly they had fallen back into their old

routine, and her discomfort level was off the charts. “I

didn’t,” he replied. “Jansen went shopping for me.”

Despite herself, she smiled at the image of

Ryan’s hunky assistant traipsing through the

maternity department in search of clothes and—evenmore hilarious—going into the lingerie store to buy

panties and bras.

“How is Jansen?”

“Fine,” Ryan replied. “Same as ever.”

“Thank you for this,” she added, swallowing her

all-important pride for the moment.

His smile was genuine. “You’re quite welcome.

Why don’t you go lie down for a while and I’ll pack

our suitcases. Then we can have dinner. We’ll call it

an early night since we’re leaving tomorrow

morning.”

She left the clothes on the couch and slowly rose.

It was stupid of her to soften toward him. It was

stupid to wish even for a moment that things were

back to the way they’d been before.

But being stupid didn’t stop the yearning deep

inside her aching heart. Sadness overwhelmed her,

and she hurriedly left the living room so he wouldn’t

see her tears.

The next morning Ryan gently shook her awake

and she stretched languidly before getting up. After

her shower, he fixed them breakfast. When they

were done eating, he gathered their luggage to take

down to the car.

On the drive to the airport Kelly was quiet. A part

of her felt a tingle of excitement at the prospect of a

week in paradise with Ryan, while the other part

dreaded the forced intimacy. She had focused so

much on her anger and hatred that it had come as a

shock to her that she was still deeply in love with

Ryan. And that frustrated her more than anything.

Was she a masochist?

First of all to love a man who quite obviously did

not love her in return, but to love him even after his

most cutting betrayal? Pathetic.

To her surprise, they weren’t taking a commercial

flight. Ryan had chartered a private jet to take them

nonstop to the island.

The flight was just a few hours, but halfway throughshe began fidgeting in her seat. She was nervous,

edgy, and she was suffering a major case of cold

feet.

“Why don’t you recline your seat,” he said,

reaching over to help her.

When she was tilted back he nudged her over.

“Turn on your side and I’ll rub your back.”

Too uncomfortable to turn down his touch, she

faced the window and settled on her side.

Strong, tender fingers began a slow exploration of

her back, rubbing and kneading. She sighed in

contentment and relief as the tension faded in her

muscles. Yawning widely, she snuggled deeper into

the seat, enjoying the delicious sensations his touch

was bringing.

For just a little while, she forced the past from her

mind. She forced thoughts of the future away as well.

All she focused on was the fact that she was with

Ryan and he was acting as tender and loving as he

had when they’d been together.

She went to sleep with a smile on her face.

As they prepared to land, Ryan shook her awake

and raised her seat back up. She was so relaxed

and lethargic that she sat there quietly while the

plane touched down.

Fifteen minutes later, Ryan wrapped a protective

arm around her as they exited the plane. He seated

her in the waiting car while he saw that the luggage

was loaded and then they drove away.

They checked into the lavish hotel that was

situated directly on the beach, and Ryan jokingly

informed her that when his partnership’s resort was

built, it would make the one they were staying in look

like a two-star hotel instead of the five stars it

boasted.

Kelly found that hard to believe when they were

ushered into a sprawling suite that was many times

bigger than her apartment in Houston.

She sank into the couch, that looked out the

sliding patio doors to the private expanse of beach

beyond. Ryan put away their luggage and then knelt

in front of her, slipping her shoes off to inspect her

feet for swelling. He began massaging the souls,

moving up to the instep and arch. A moan of

absolute pleasure escaped her lips.

“Feel good?”

“Oh myGod, does it.”

He continued his ministrations, watching her

silently. Her hand crept to her rounded belly and she

smiled as the baby rolled beneath her fingers.

“Is the baby moving?” Ryan asked.

She nodded and he stopped rubbing her feet.

“Can I feel?”

She brought his hand to her stomach and placed

it over the spot where her hand had been. He jerked

in surprise as her stomach bumped beneath his

palm, and his expression was akin to awe.

“That’s incredible. Doesn’t it hurt?”

Chuckling, she said, “No. It isn’t always

comfortable, but it’s certainly not painful.”

He kept his hand there a few more moments and

then rose, a regretful glint in his eyes. “Would you

like to have dinner on the patio or do you want to go

eat in the restaurant?”

“Here, please,” she replied. “I like our view and it’s

private.”

He nodded his agreement and went to phone in

their room service order.

Thirty minutes later the meal was wheeled in on a

serving cart and the attendant set the table out on thepatio. The two ate in silence, enjoying the setting sunand the sound of the waves crashing in the distance.

As they finished, Ryan suggested she go to bed;

but she wasn’t tired. She was quite rested actually

qyand felt an eagerness to explore their secluded

cove. When she expressed the desire to take a walk

along the beach, Ryan hesitated at first, but agreed

to accompany her when she was adamant about

going.

Kelly breathed deeply of the salty air as the ocean

breeze whipped at her long hair, lifting it from her

waist. She slipped her sandals off and bent

awkwardly to pick them up. Ryan quickly gathered

them for her and tucked them under his arm. Diggingher toes into the damp sand, she ventured into the

bubbling surf, letting the foam wash over her feet.

Ryan removed his shoes and joined her after he

rolled up the cuffs of his jeans. He slipped an arm

around her as they made their way down the beach,

but she resisted the urge to move closer to his side.

“We shouldn’t go far,” he cautioned. “You aren’t

supposed to be on your feet for this long. I promised

the doctor this would be a restful trip for you.”

“This is a lot more restful than being on my feet

twelve hours a day,” she said lightly.

He frowned and his hand tightened around her

waist. “That won’t happen again.”

She didn’t respond, but turned back toward their

suite. Ryan’s hand slipped from her waist as she

walked ahead of him. When they walked back inside

the patio doors, Kelly sank onto the plush couch.

“Would you like something to drink?” he asked.

“Juice, if you have it.”

He rummaged in the well-stocked fridge and

came back with a glass of orange juice a moment

later.

“You should go on to bed,” he said gently. “There’ll

be plenty of time to explore the beach after you’ve

had a good night’s rest.”

Even though she was tired, the day had been

so…perfect…that she hated to bring it to an end.

Spending the time with Ryan had been bittersweet, athrowback to happier times when things had been…She sighed. She had to stop with the endless

string of memories. She had a week with Ryan. One

week when the past wasn’t supposed to matter. If he

could forget then she would try to as well. And when

it came to an end, maybe her memories of him

wouldn’t be quite so bitter.

She struggled to get out of the ultrasoft couch and

laughed when she realized she was well and truly

stuck. Ryan reached down to help her to her feet and

she finally managed to stand.

For a long moment she stood in front of him, her

gaze stroking softly over the chiseled lines of his

face. It was the first time she’d allowed herself to

stare unguardedly at him.

“Good night, Ryan,” she whispered softly.

He looked as though he wanted to kiss her and for

a moment she wondered how she would react if he

did. But finally he said, “Good night, Kelly. Sleep

well.”

She turned to go into her bedroom, little twinges

of regret nagging her the entire way