Beautiful desire

My life living in Alice Walter is nothing short of uneventful and ironic, I’ve never really had an identity all my life, I don’t know who I am, I mean, I know that I am 5’5 with long thick chestnut hair, I have an oval-shaped face with honey brown doe eyes and pouty lips, a slender neck, slim arms, narrow waist, round hips, small bursts and golden brown skin.

I also know that I am one of the famous Alice Walter girls, famous indeed, at least in this world we are. Alice Walter in an institution, an underground institution where, lost, forgotten, abandoned girls are groomed, trained then auctioned, sold, or even gifted to powerful people, to do whatever they’d like with their newly purchased girls, in exchange for confidentiality and protection. Who am I without the name Walter attached to my person? I have no idea, I was brought in at an early age, by early I mean straight out of the hospital, I guess that the woman who birthed me couldn’t wait to get rid of me, not that I care, she isn’t my mother. I learned at a very young age that family isn’t always flesh and blood. The other girls who were brought in at a much older age talk a lot about parents and sometimes siblings, that got me thinking about a group of individuals whom I know nothing about that share similar DNA with me, that piece of information as intriguing as it is, is useless. I confronted Mistress Joaquin about what I had discovered and her response was “Mijah, DNA might be the scientific answer but it doesn’t make a family” I believe what she said, she’s one of the oldest and most respected Mistresses here, she treats me like I am her daughter.

Some of the other girls find it strange that at 20, I am still here, stuck at Alice Walter, seeing that I’ve spent my whole life here, I should’ve been out of the system earlier, why haven’t I been bought, or given out, well some girls are groomed to be sold at a higher rate than others because they are to be sold at a much older age and then some are to be sold young. There are different types of girls here, I should have been part of those to be sold at a much younger age but due to how protective Mistress Joaquin is of me, I remained in the system.

Ma let me in on a little gossip, the mistresses are planning on holding another auction, the first in about a decade, I was 9 the last time an auction was held, and a lot of girls were taken after, I remember being in the library while the dining hall was swarmed with people, the girls were dressed beautifully I even told Ma that I wanted to be auctioned too, she said I wouldn’t want to when I get older and I don’t, at least not anymore but I don't have a choice, I can’t run, I’d be shot dead before I even make it out of the front door, the last time girls tried to run, it ended in a blood bath, I would’ve been killed too but I was young and Ma raised a case that I was naive and easily fooled but I know I wasn’t fooled, I wanted to see the outside world, I’ve never seen past this disturbingly high fence that surrounds Alice Warner, the whole compound is big, there’s nothing that isn’t here, there’s a gym, we have the recreational area, we have a pool the whole place looks like a Victorian area building with a lot of modern day facilities and upgrades, I know, I’ve seen a lot of movies. “Girls, report to the dining area” That’ll be Mistress Margaret, she’s English, the only English Mistress here but not the only one with an accent, most of the mistresses here are either American, Spanish, Italian, or French. The girls here are expected to learn at least one language excluding English, seeing as I’ve been here my whole life, I’m currently learning my 3rd language English inclusive, I developed an accent too over the years because of my strange fascination for the British and the fact that I learned my English under an English woman, let’s just say it was expected. I make my way towards the mirror by my dresser, staring back at me is a girl I recognize only that I look sicker, my skin is breaking out and my cheeks look puffier than usual. It’s the second week of the month, I’ll soon have my monthly visitor anytime now. I rolled my eyes, just great. I arrange my blouse and tuck it into my blue plain shirt, we have uniforms, I have two pairs of these and a bunch of other clothes that I grew out of.

We are all gathered in the dining hall, in our uniforms standing before our 30 mistresses. “Girls, we are hosting an event this Saturday, and we have a list of 30 girls who are to be auctioned, those who are called are to come out here and stand before your sisters”, “I bet you my shower gel that our names will be called,” Penny says next to me, “of course, our names will be called Penny, we have overstayed our welcome” I say. “… Juliette King, Charlotte Daniel’s, Denice McAllen, Penelope Ambrose, Roseanne Walter…” We both giggle at that, “Anne, this means we have just a day to say goodbye” Penny sighs, “Oh cmon Penny, I’ve known you my whole life, well most of my life and I promise you Penny that this can never be goodbye for us, we’re not over” I say under my breath, she let out a breath. We both walk up to the front where the other girls are standing. After all of the names were called, we were all assigned to a Mistress to help prepare us for the upcoming event.

Ma took Penny and me under her wing, only a certain amount of mistresses were allowed to prepare us, and the others weren’t exactly skilled with the basic things needed to set us up. I was surprised that she agreed to tend to Penny because they never saw eye to eye, ma says Penny uses bad words, I do too, in my mind at least. I know it’s all just BS because she also has a soft spot for her, Penny will never admit it but I know she does too, that or they just get along for my sake and I’ll take that.